The World's Worst Bartender
I'm the world's worst bartender
I'm cheap at the bar
I get all my cheap splendor
From the trunk of my car.
I get really lazy
My place is a wreck
When I see Patrick Swayze
I hit the deck.
Have no liquor permit
I get the most cop calls
When the place is too quite
I host mandatory brawls
My beers taste like Sprites
I sell fifty-four ouncers
I pick fights
With my own bouncers
I'm out of my prime
'Cause I don't do things right
I'm open during daytime
And closed at night
I'm the worst no doubt
They call me a clown
Been driven out
Of too many towns
I'm a hard working striver
But my rep is plowed
Designated drivers
Are not allowed
I burn down my place
I'm a man of endurance
I don't leave a trace
'Cause I want the insurance
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Hahaha... love the ending. Sounds like a lot of fun and not such a bad hangover if there isn't much booze in the drinks.
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lol. That is great. I like the mandatory brawls idea. Creative. I wonder how many customers wouldn't have to be asked to have brawls in the bars, though.
I also like the idea of how you take so much of the laws of drinking and have this bartender just not give a darn what his customers do afterwards. Ha, not the kind of bartender you want running a bar, but humorous nonetheless. Thanks for letting me know about this poem of the series.
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