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Come Mourning

Missing image

 

As sorrow clawed through my veins, I became immune to starlight -

shuddering beneath this eclipse,

submerged in savage waves crashing slowly against my heart.


Terrible tides consume my flesh; my mind surges,

swirling through chaotic currents - I can no longer taste my own salt.

A morose mosaic with missing pieces,

this shattered terrazzo tears beneath my feet,

a mere pariah without recompense or resolve.


Nothing can mollify this descent of dusk -

there are only lilies that have not yet been gathered,

strewn solemnly across the field where once we knelt,

our alabaster skin shining with dew.

In your absence, I am fractured.

 

These thorns of silence attempt to thwart my grief,

but I will not be moved from this curled corner, wrapped in weariness.

Darkness arrives unnoticed, without a wisp of sound.

 

This is me, letting you go.

 

 


 

Author notes

 

 

 

Picture credit: =princess of shadows@deviantart


prompt: The last line of your poem must be "This is me letting you go."

no more than 30 lines



A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 9 of 9
  • ecrivain01
    2 days ago
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    Edit | Reply

    Rather extraordinary write ...

    here. I agree with the gentleman who posted below. This is the most telling line:

    A morose mosaic with missing pieces,

    and it reeks of sadness and angst. This is almost too poignant for me at the time. Anyway, good work, as always.

    Keep on keeping on.

  • JToddUnderhill
    November 11
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    Edit | Reply

    Killing.....

    ..... this is such a hard contest to judge. I think I am going to make next years contest harder. The best line of the poem in my book "A morose mosaic with missing pieces,"


  • Danny Beatty gold member
    November 7

    Edit | Reply

    this is a sad symphony of bittersweet memories and ancient aches.

    good luck in the contest.



  • IrishGypsyRose silver member
    November 7

    Edit | Reply
    Fantastic! I loved this. You did an amazing job of grabbing and holding my attention. The imagery and flow were wonderful and the metaphors were stunning. It made me heart sick...that is exactly what I wanted. Great read and best of luck in this contest. Thank you for entering. ~gypsy~


  • JinSays gold member
    November 7

    Edit | Reply
    this one is gonna stick.
    terribly sad.
    love,
    jin


  • penman gold member
    November 7

    Edit | Reply

    Powerful

    Another write that is dipped in pure intense thoughts. So very masterfully crafted. Best of luck in the contest


  • mgmc gold member
    November 7

    Edit | Reply
    Masterfully written! I'd point out favorite words and phrases but I'd run out of space.....but just as examples (sorrow clawed through my veins, immune to starlight, etc etc). My dear, I must study your writing and perhaps some of it will rub off!! Very impressive work!

    Your friend and admirer,
    Marlene


  • the charmed one
    November 7

    Edit | Reply
    wow this poem left me speechless . its so original and beaitiful i love it . in some way i could relate its not easy letting go . i love this stanza

    "These thorns of silence attempt to thwart my grief,
    but I will not be moved from this curled corner, wrapped in weariness.
    Darkness arrives unnoticed, without a wisp of sound.

    This is me, letting you go." i love it ! your are amazing writer i know i have said that before just by reading your poems feeling inspired allready


  • Amera gold member
    November 7

    Edit | Reply
    When you are prompted to write a sad poem, you certainly pull out all the stops. This is original and beautifully penned.

    Love,
    Amera♥

1 - 9 of 9