Dont tell me
I didnt think enough about it
standing by the roadside with your
aborted poster
and your penis pantsed high
and out of touch
I talk to it
even now
it comes to see me
this unknown child
and I have no excuses
but weve made our peace
so I dont need your traffic-light judgement
I wonder
god faring man
are you happy
that a kerbside glance
at your blind disappointment
makes me teary
distresses me greatly
snaps me out of a carefree happiness
that i rightfully earned
driving home
in 5 0'clock Friday gridlock
whistling joy
to the radio
and you just feel compelled to
remind me of something
that is my burden
and takes me way
way down.
A contest entry
- Abortion; by Naridill.
539 points, ended November 12, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
"traffic-light judgement"
That is a stunner. Stop me in my tracks and I had to re-read this again and again. I adore that phrase and the metaphor and imagery it alone holds. Your ending was superb, hit the emotional level just right. -
Moralizing is a great way to bring people down so that they might acknowledge you. You may notice that a plea for *whatever* is sure to follow. The universe is more fantastic than any god or demon. It doesn't give us what we want, but does whatever it needs to without regard to human ideology. The universe is truly psychotic. I'm not suggesting that we should be as well. Only that when someone tries moralizing upon you and grabbing your sutures and pulling...try to disentangle them...however you can....and if you can't...tell them you don't give a shit...no matter how much you may. Whatever means you use is less beguiling than the trap set for you. It doesn't matter that they don't know all of this. Don't pay for the stupidity of others. The universe will take care of it all and it won't give you an ounce of shit about it. That's what it's there for.
-
Very strong. A very emotive issue handled with empathy and compassion. One of very best works my talented friend!







