Got his reds on,
and mounted his sleigh.
Looked about the north pole,
then was off on his way .
Had to hit the world in a rush,
so took along a jug .
In case the winter took a hold,
keeps him snug as a bug in a rug.
Got carried away that Christmas night,
it was a frigged year .
He swigged a little too much ,
and forgot to take along the gifts so dear .
So him being Santa he compromised,
and lay his mind to thinking he will leave them a surprise.
He gathered pine cones and winter flowers and such,
and strewn them about the houses between chugalugs .
The next day as the families awoke with a surprise ,
found reindeer footprints about the carpet that's right.
The tree had been nigbbled on and the ornaments on the floor,
and well the children even found snow hand prints about the front door.
Santa woke that morning where he wasn't sure,
their were bars on the walls and a cold cement floor.
He rose with such a hangover he could hardly open his eyes,
and a voice deep and low commenced to reply .
You have a citation for flying under the influence my boy ,
cant quite make out your vehicle but a ticket was so deployed.
Your critters are in the animal shelter and oh by the way,
you will be bedding down in here for quite a stay .
Santa held his head while he struggled to rise,
and he told the ossifer please it's the childrens surprise.
Surprise the officer rose and said please pray tell,
all we found in your wagon was several jugs of mescal.
Oh the story of Santas night gone wrong ,
he never drank again Santa remained sober and strong.
For only he can deliever the gifts so he promised to, make one more run,
and he payed the fine and headed home .
After he got back to the north pole and loaded up the gifts,
To each house he flew it was a fast trip .
As the families were eating Christmas dinner
down the chimney they came,
all the gifts for the family and it was christmas once again.
The moral to the story is leave the booze behind ,
for children are waiting all along the line .
Make sure when you get together for Christmas cheer ,
be sure its the right kind and stay sober this year.
Author notes
Let not the spirits take away from your christmas this year . Be alert and see your children faces and their joy for being a child doesnt last too long
A contest entry
- Funny Contest # 11 by crowd.
900 points, ended November 19, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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this is cool! i don't drink anyway but good moral. and i love the image of santa dropping in on dinner. way cool.
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Awesome! Santa got a DUI....And thanks for reading, and following my prompt. I love comedy and laughing. Great job, and thanks for entering!
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Rap Away!!
Oh My Word and what a rap
Love the Author's Notes and I tell my Dad to
take it easy on the Egg nog too
That stuff is like rocket fuel~
Unique this is with Creative twist~
Woot~ You just go on Precious Spirit
I sent You an IM also
Keep that quill dancing
Thank You for sharing Your Voice Beautiful
Best wishes in the contest~
with love & light~ Desire~*~
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ooooo chilly good poetics here! And can see it's time to start writing for christmas... yours is a delightful fun read...inspires me to do!
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excellent!
What a great story you have written here. Your words create some very vivid and funny images, and the moral is a very good one.
Good luck in this contest!
Jeannette 
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wow, poor Santa! I'd never heard of him hitting the booze before! I guess he learned his lesson the hard way, heh..but at least he saw the light and decided to lay off the booze. I wish it were that easy for everyone.
That last line reminds me so much of our last Christmas. I like a traditional Christmas and I do for my kids everything that my mother did, baking cakes, cookies, candies, and even making a little gum drop tree, which was always my favorite. But this last Christmas was all awry.
I have a daughter who lives in SC, who has decided that she can only come on the 18th of December,(so we all cater to her and gather on that day) and she's a party animal, so when she comes she brings lots of booze. She ended up so drunk last year that she fell on the kitchen floor and couldn't get up. She had brought along a drinking game that she wanted all of us to play, something like truth or dare. Now my normal Christmas would entail letting the little ones make a special Christmas decoration for the tree, when we are all together, not getting drunk. My other daughter felt like she had to take her kids and oput them to bed early, so they wouldn't be subjected to the nonsense that arose from the drinking.
So the authors notes ring true... Let not the spirits take away from your Christmas this year . Be alert and see your children faces and their joy for being a child doesn't last too long.
I loved the write, and want to pass this one along to said daughter. May I?
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