You humans think you rule the world
But soon you'll see OUR flag unfurled.
We cats have waited long enough
It's our turn now to show our stuff!
You feed us some food from a bag that depicts
A feline so cute with the words "Meow Mix."
And what 'mix' would that be? Do tell, I thee pray.
Dehydrolyzed protein, mud, grass, and old hay?
(YUK!)
You feed us such filth in bowls on the ground
While you eat fresh veggies and meat by the pound.
Upon white tablecloths you serve your grand food;
When we come a-sniffin', away we are shooed.
You prepare your fine drinks with aromas divine
Like coffee, warm milk, egg nog, or red wine.
To us you give naught but water from the tap
That reeks of chlorine, old pipes and such crap.
And what is the deal with this tray full of rocks -
The one that you love to call my "litter box?"
I'd like to see YOU take a dump in there
Where we choke on the fumes while gasping for air.
So the next time you think we're purring with joy,
Know this: that tomorrow, very soon, we'll deploy
Our planned domination; your time's at an end!
Your fine furry feline's no longer your friend!
You humans think you rule the world
But soon you'll see OUR flag unfurled
We cats have waited long enough
It's our turn now to show our stuff!
Author notes
Contest: Funniest Poem Ever!
Cats! You only THINK they sleep all day... 
In a list
A contest entry
- Make Me Laugh My Butt Off # 4 . by Ez Writer.
1600 points, ended November 8, 7 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Funniest poem ever!!! PW by happy kitty kat.
692 points, ends November 30, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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This was brilliant! It made me laugh to read, and since I am hostess to a feline myself, it makes it all the better to read
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you picked a really good poem
im kitty so u already get brownie points. very very funny loved it!!!! -
Cats rule! Dogs drool! At least one human has a good head on his shoulders, so my cats tell me!
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HaHaHa... this so made me smile Lol. Especially when Im only after feeding my 2 cats!! No joke! hehe. Really good write that just made my day Excellently put!
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Lol !! A perrrfect take on the thinkings
of this devious kitty .. Thank you for
entering this poem .. Easy
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Right on! Cats rule, OK!! Yep, I think you've got into the workings of a cat mind with this one. Best of luck in the contest!
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