Tragedy leaves from the tragedy tree,
Slamming our knees and demanding debris.
Amnesty frees us from having to bleed.
Damaging needs keep us stammering, see?
Hammering nails in the coffins of free.
Everything fails when the locks never flee.
Camera's see films of what's lost in the sea.
Our disease fills up a lot of hungry.
Bibles can't kill us and know it's the truth.
Rifles can fill us with bullets, so shoot.
We think you're too scared to pull it, are you?
Please sink the two shots, don't blow it, or do?
We are the Maidens of Death, who are you?
Please don't complain or you'll rest in the blue.
Death can get busy so we help him too.
Pessimist twins that the Demons pursue.
Author notes
Prompt 1: Explain who they are. (From the picture.)
Artist Credit: Sylvia Ji (Normally I would post the image's original URL but I do not have it.)
I understand how the last line of the third stanza could seem confusing, but I assure you that after reading it a few times you'll get it.
A contest entry
- Picture, Word Bank, Quote OH MY!: Pick a Prompt for a Dark Write! by Concrete Angel.
1050 points, ended November 20, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Going for the Gold (PWs ONLY) by Intricate Wordsmith.
600 points, ended November 19, 93 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think?
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Very Interesting
This is out of my reading area so I am lost on the symbolic importance. You put it together very nicely so even an old country girl can understand most of it.
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Reading your poems always makes me want to write rhyme. There's just something you do...some trick! I know you have some sort of secret, hehe. But don't worry, poets and magicians get to keep their secrets. Love the last line, it was brilliant.
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Thank you.
It must be a very good secret because even I don't know it, lol.
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No signs of forced rhyme. Nice flow. Unique idea and title. Great write. Thanks for entering and congratulations you just made it to the finalists' list
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I think the rhyme scheme really works in your favor here. Gives it a real sense mocking fun to a dark, dark pair. I really love just reading it. So solid in its shape and form. And the characters seem even more dangerous and unpredictable because of the rhyme... scary sort of clown people. Great job, Nick!
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Thank you, I appreciate the comment. I'm glad you like the poem.
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LOVED it! I kind of pictured the two standing before an audience in a side show or something taking turns reciting these lines in hushed tones to introduce themselves. Your rhyme and flow are perfectly executed and really add to the sinister tone that this poem presents. You have done a wonderfully chilling job of telling me who these maniacal looking twins are
Loved every word! Great write! Oh, before I forget... the last word of the poem is that supposed to be "pursue" in stead of "purse" that's what I was expecting, but I think you missed a letter there Still a great poem, just thought I'd point out the typo
Thanks for entering and good luck! -
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Thank you for the great comment.
Also, thank you for noticing the spelling error. I always double check my spelling and I'm not sure how that slipped by, but thanks again for letting me know. It's been fixed.
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awesome
a great poem...
you got great rhyme going on here...
and well written from the picture....
well done for this piece..
this was my fav stanza
Bibles can't kill us and know it's the truth.
Rifles can fill us with bullets, so shoot.
We think you're too scared to pull it, are you?
Please sink the two shots, don't blow it, go soon.
nice one and good luck in z contest
Jayde
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Thank you.
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