With the click of a button
I arrived
just in time
to witness four hundred
and forty two die!
A son tries to dig out his mother
with his fingernails,
as the world watches,
unsuccessful!
Tries again!
too stressful!
I click before I realize I'm doing it.
A wall of water,
towering, over a city!
one man can save them
Click...
He had a vest,
full of nastiness,
and he wants
to make a better world,
for the daughter he loves.
Sorry!
Click,
Bored now
I look out the other window
Two 'must be twenties'
loitering by the bin,
grab empty beer bottles
they shadow a 'Gran'
into the alley below...
I'm really not in the mood
Maybe there's something else to see
A contest entry
- poems tell stories by Virgoan.
1200 points, ended November 11, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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The first half really pulled me in the second half bored me a bit. Editing this piece will make this really a stronger poem. Just my thought.
I like the feel of ending here.
Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks for the feedback! I agree with you and have made some edits to the poem hopefully to make it better.
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