Blue eyes
Look down on me
Disappointed
Afraid
Disgusted
At the crimson honey dripping down my arm
At the cuts, splitting muscle until they greet pale bone
At my "mistakes"
At my depression
You see,
To me, they are not mistakes
They are memories
Emotions
Thoughts
Dreams
They are my story
This is the one when I was mad at you
This from when he said goodbye
This from the time no one seemed to hear me
This from when it was just all too much
You have problems
Maybe bigger than mine
But while others deal,
I turn to tears
Depression
Cutting
Release
And maybe you are more than me
For resisting the pull of the razor
But maybe you are just as "crazy"
Maybe you just hide it better
Maybe
Maybe I don't deserve your blue eyes
Looking down on me
Pretending you care
When really you are horrified
Blue eyes
Looking down
Thinking less of me by the second
Please comment, I've just started publishing and I've never had someone's opinion...
Comments
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ohmigosh!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!
this is exactly what im going through and wat makes it even better my friend has blue eyes and hes the only i have told about my problem.....its just a great poem and it reallly hits home so thank you soo much!
U
R
AMAZING!!! -
Young poet
As a one time cutter I can say this honestly... The scars always remain. On the inside as well as visible. We must think kinder of ourselves for in the end we only have we. And that urge , sadly , it always is there when down time appears. Happy writing young poet.
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Welcome to Allpoetry
This is so sad, mostly because I have friends who've been through this, and I can empathize with you. While I don't condone the practice itself, I do understand its use as a coping-mechanism, and I understand that most people who do SI do so because they want to live; not die. Even so, no one deserves to be thought less of, regardless of whether they smoke, cut, drink, etc... We are all still people, and we all still bleed red.
Poems like this usually affect me because of the subject-matter, rather than how well they are written. That said, you did what most writers do not, and touched on the emotional side of things. A lot of people who write about cutting focus solely on the physical aspects of the moment; blood, their immediate surroundings (ie: kitchen knives, bathroom floors) and fail to get into the emotional side; guilt, euphoria, pain; which have the greatest ability to touch your audience.
I hope this isn't personal, to you, or to anyone you know. If it is, and you feel like talking to someone who won't judge you, let me know.
Keep up the good work, and keep writing.
Stay safe,
Laura
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