If I’d known it’d be the last time
That I’d hold you close
I would have held on forever
But I hadn’t understood
The casualties of war
Boy, you looked like a hero
And heroes never die
I was four when you left
To fight the enemy
You were superman,
As far as I could see
Two years later
Mommy told me
That you weren’t comin’ home
I watched
as a procession hailed you
And wondered where you were
I didn’t understand
How a war could take my hero
Who could need a hero more than I?
I told mommy
that my hero must have been true
For heaven to need my hero
My hero
Brave
And True
She wiped away the tears and said
If so This is where I want to be
In a land where heroes like him die
To make people like us free
Author notes
veteran's day
A contest entry
- November New Member Contest by AP Greeters.
600 points, ends November 30, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Which ending do you like best? Let me know and your comment will get an auto matic 5 stars!
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Welcome to AllPoetry
I think I like the second optional ending best.
Thanks for entering the November new members contest. Your poem is packed with emotion that touches any of us who have had anyone near us serving in the military.
Just a heads up, the rules in the new members contest state that your write must be between 10 and 30 lines. You might want to consider entering the new members contest without including the second poem and adjusting your line breaks where it is only 30 lines long. Also be sure and put your option in your authors notes so you will be in compliance with all the contest rules
You mention the first poem being a prewrite, but it still qualifies as a freshwrite for site purposes unless you already posted it on the site previously.
Both poems are quiet emotional and touching. Best of luck in the contest and definately keep penning
Violet
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Thanks, sorry I had it running in two separate contests and the second one was part of another contest, thanks for your input on the endings, i am glad you liked the shorter one because I am pretty sure it is exactly 30 lines now. And My Hero was actually a fresh write for this contest but by the time I had entered it into the other contest I considered it old enough to refer to it as a prewrite, thanks for letting me know.
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welcome to allpoetry
thank you so much for this heartfelt entry, the vets of our country deserve so much more than we give them, freedom comes at a high cost, but it is freedom that makes us who we are and for who that boy that hero of yours fought for, well done on this and please keep up the writing,
cheers
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If I’d known it’d be the last time
That I’d hold you close
I would have held on forever
Aw.. So sweet
Thanks for entering and it's unfortunate he didn't come home.
- Blue
beauty
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I am in the finalist or am I done? I could not find mine listed anywhere maybe I missed it?
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the judges comment till the end, and the winners are picked at the end of the month, so no worries you will get a note in the system with the contest ends,
Krystal
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Welcome to AllPoetry
I can not imagine losing someone in the war having only lost family and friends to cancer, suicide and accidents but the power within this piece reaches out to me; deeply penned this holds truth, imagery and emotions
Thank You for Your Entry and Best of Luck!
I hope you enjoy AllPoetry and continue to share your words with us
♥
Stay safe
~Manda
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This brought tears to my eyes. Like someone else who commented on this said, it had childlike innocence to it that made the 'sad reality that much harder'. As with many things I like, I unfortunately cannot explain exactly why I like this. I do know that I'm happy to have great competetion.
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Welcome to Allpoetry
I like this poem, and it's a tribute to all those soldiers who fought and died for our freedom. My great-grandfather fought in World War Two, and received many medals of distinction, but it was a hard time for him; he's only starting to talk about it now, and he's ninety-five years old. I love hearing his stories, though.
As for you, I hope his isn't personal. Nonetheless, this part is beautiful:
"Boy, you looked like a hero
and heroes never die."
There's a childlike innocence about those words that makes the sad reality that much harder. Even heroes die; everyone does, and that's a concept that's hard to understand, when we're young. Well done, and thank you for your lovely entry.
Laura
Site Greeter
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Thanks for your comment on My Hero
Sorry, I took so long to get back for you. Thank you for your comment it makes the poem much more personal and have more more emotion and meaning. I love how you tied in your story on your grandpa and were able to personalize it and find the meaning between the lines. Thanks bunch.
-Tres
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