Man it has been a long time
So I had to stop and write this rhyme
I have forgotten what is was like
Even though it’s like riding a bike
When it comes to this I have pulled my own
So many times the neighbor has know
The mailman and the blind man down the street
All have heard me tenderize my meat
The cats in my house move real slow
For I get excited as a slight breeze does blow
I use the restroom at my bank
Just for a moment to stop and spank
Then emerge with a sheepish grin
Wanting to take the teller for a spin
Then the time at the grocery store
When my tube steak needed so much more
Behind the produce section it was not planned
But I took matters into my own hand
At the amusement park on the Ferris wheel
Pulled it out just to cop a feel
Then another load I do make
Want some icing on your funnel cake?
Even the court room is exempt
I had to hold myself in contempt
In a showroom in a new car trunk
I had to go again thunk, thunk, thunk
In the middle of my work at night
When I read what other poets write
I lose all self control
I have to stroke my elongated pole
In my car as I am crossing town
Dollars to doughnuts I am getting down
I do not care about the traffic jam
I just start polishing my ham
Then at Wal-mart while buying tires
I became a slave to my desires
At the Denny’s where no one else can see
I had dreams that were clouds in my coffee
Then I switched my cup with yours
So you could have me within your pores
When at the doctors when I am sick
The nurses drive my growing stick
What, that is not the sample that you wanted
I say with a smile, seemingly undaunted
At the truck stop in my own booth
I relive the love of my youth
As the waitress walks on by
I let another pearly load fly
At Home Depot when buy some nails
Once again my stiffy never fails
I slip into the nearest shed display
Pull it out and jerk away
So when you are where I have been before
And you feel something sticky on the floor
Block it out however you choose
But I think have something on you shoes
A contest entry
- Sexually Frustrated, Hmmm!!! by Poetryintheblood.
900 points, ended November 8, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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fuhckin hilarious
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OMG! LMAO! You are so funny. This is priceless and I actually blushed which I don't usually do. NOT! lol Thank you for letting me read your funny yet creative poem and I loved it.
Brook -
lmao rofl pmpl omfg..this is just soooo feckin awesome..such a fun write and yet with the cleverly crafted stamp one would expect from you
bravo my clever poet friend
T
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"I let another pearly load fly" --> what a gold line! too brilliant!
this is utterly fantastic; I was laughing and blushing the whole way through ... and I do not blush easily but my gosh I couldn't help it with this
and you rhymed!
amazing!
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LOL you are so funny hun this rocks...well done for you have the humor here .. Awesome mindLove it Hugs always Angel♥
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Lmaoooooo, you sound like me, except I'm the opposite sex yet so damn horny 24/7 Lol, this was hilarious, and yet so damn relatable Lol, brilliant in every word and stroke hehe, thank you and good luck in all
Josie 
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