What was once unblemished

What was once unblemished,
Is now covered in red.
It never shuts up,
That voice in my head.

It tells me to do it,
I just can’t stop it.
The knife in my hand,
I wish I could drop it.

The red is in ribbons,
That ooze down my arm.
I should be afraid,
But I’m never alarmed.

Cutting is my drug,
I’m fully addicted.
I can never find a reason,
I’m never convicted

I should tell someone,
They wouldn’t understand.
Drowning in a sea of pain,
Never to reach dry land.

What was once unblemished,
Is now rough and course.
Screaming for help but never receiving,
My voice is sore and hoarse.

Comforting and warm,
It’s draining out my day.
I feel my sins seep out,
My stress just drains away.

I’ll never cut to deep,
But even if I do.
No one would really care,
So I’ll just follow through.

I lay back on my bed,
As dizziness sweeps in.
I forget that I’m a fuck up,
I forget just where I’ve been.

What was once unblemished,
Now is slashed at carved.
For affection and mercifulness,
The world has me starved.

A slash straight down my arm,
The red begins to pour.
Tears have all dried up,
As I fall onto the floor.

A final kiss goodbye,
To the life I never had.
I feel the armor fall,
In which I had been clad.

Ribbons make an ocean,
And breath slows to a stop.
When you find me here,
Your heart I hope won’t drop.

Even though I’m 10 years old,
My sole is dried and dead.
My last breath blew some bubbles,
In my little lake of red.