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Night Music

She feeds them well plays twilight games
and comes her time she runs a bath lights
candles on the sink along the edge of the
tub and on the frosted window sill throws
colored beads into the hot water and strips
while they spread the damp closeness of
cedar.  She piles up her hair and pins it
with raised arms that lift her breasts. She
arches her back thrusts those mother hips
and sways to unheard music in and out of
the light shards that dance like splintered
moonbeams through pine and hemlock
and she sinks into the water slides under
the candlelight the mirror sends running
like oily film across the wall with the towel
rack and the ceiling pulsing like northern
lights all colored stripes waving curves and
surrenders to the ancients and the icons
huddles with them in the slipping moments
tilts back the universal head and sings.

 

 

Author notes

If our working vocabulary continues to shrink, perhaps
communications within our species will be reduced to noises
and gestures and our only ideas will relate to survival.
Instead of writing and reading poetry we will howl.

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8
  • I think you have howled here, Tom. Most definitely. I am amazed at how you took a few moments that might have passed unnoticed and turned them into something magical. You describe the woman as a real person, but make us think, I might know her, I might be her...and then you turn her into a queen or goddess or some marvelous, perfect creature deserving the magnificent show that surrounds her simple routine, and then we realize...yes! that's what she is in the first place!

    Your descriptions are so absolutely spellbinding. Her movements, the reflections and lights, the smells... I was there. This is an "up close" poem, so intimate and so real.

    This idea of night music really requires remark, particular in that she is alone and seemingly so at the essence of herself. There are beneath these silent strains no other bonds that hold her, no responsibilites, no appearances, no expectations.

    She is liberated, and not that she has been chained, but maybe hidden. We are aware that these are precious, "slipping moments" and relish them along with her.

    The understated structure here works so well to compliment the exquisite description. The poem becomes almost a mirror of the woman herself...something quite special to achieve.

    Could point out words and phrases and there are many worthy, but let's just stick with understatement for now. Excellent poetry, Tom.

    Is that Sinatra I hear?


  • Nicolette gold member
    November 7

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    yes, these simple pleasures. beautiful writing that flows and murmurs!

    ~ Nicolette


  • just mercedes gold member
    November 6

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    A wonderfully intimate glimpse of a moment, specific place and time, universal theme.

    The tension between the words that opened vistas of beauty and the dense block of type that followed no rules of line-break/breath was strange for me. It made me feel like a peeping-tom, holding my breath.

    Sometimes poetry is a howl.


  • Sue Cardwell gold member
    November 6

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    Your words have captured a moment with clarity and perfect imagery ... this is one of your most beautiful poems.

    Thank you for sharing this.

    Sue
    x


  • rollingzen
    November 6
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    beautiful!


  • katelynmcdougall
    November 6

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    this poem is amazing!!! very word is so wonderful and plays such a huge role. I feel overwhelmed, in a good way that last line is definitely the kicker though.

    well done

  • Rowan gold member
    November 5

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    Have you been watching me? lol.
    This is the poetic language of love, and much needed...
    beautiful Thomas.


  • cricketjeff gold member
    November 5

    Edit | Reply
    While words for those who love them flow
    Out language has the chance to grow
    We write our hearts in poetry
    That sets prosaic language free

    Your lady bathes by candlelight
    Your flood of words brings sweet delight
    The silent songs she dances too
    May ring with words from such as you

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