the edges curl at my feet.
ashes swirl menacingly
as they taunt me
with the knowledge
I will never possess.
my hand extending
in a futile attempt
to salvage the remains,
but it turns to
oblivion in my hands.
Author notes
prompt: into the fire.
39 words.
In a list
A contest entry
- Quickie attempt. by CentrifugalCorpse.
1300 points, ended November 5, 6 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite Contest by Blue-Rose Beauty.
1050 points, ended November 25, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
it's just a hoax .
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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but it turns to
oblivion in my hands.
Whoa, great write. It reminds me of someone telling me yesterday they had to burn all their pictures of their ex-husband and it was so hard.
Great write, filled with emotion.
Thanks for entering.
8.8/10
- Blue-
beauty
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Hi! [haven't visited you for a while haha}
So I truly liked your piece... And it seems so unimaginable to me that you could say so much with few words!
"with the knowledge
I will never possess" - great lines
Everdark* Kiss*
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This is a lovely response to the prompt you were given, Sweetie. It's easy to see why this piece of beautiful brevity garnered the gold. Well done. 
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I really like how you ended the poem. The last stanza is I personally think the poem would read better if it were a single line but of course, that's completely up to you since it doesn't change the poem much. I can see contributions of both prompts in this poem; whether it was intentional or not doesn't matter a lot. In fact, I think it's more amazing if it was unintentional. Thanks for entering and best of luck. Pen on.xx
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it was totally unintentional, thanks.
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girlll, this is bad ass! I love this, so powerful!!!
x
good luck!!
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this was very good, great imagery. =}
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"but it turns to
oblivion in my hands."
Awesome, awesome line. I love the word oblivion anyway.
This was a great read. Good luck in the contest! <3 -
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lines, you idiot. <3
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