Looking in
A million shapes in front of me
All combined into one figure
A beautiful blurred figure
Yet a Dark Beauty
It's a shattered mirror that lays in a million pieces
Forming a picture of my life
Of my fears, hopes, regrets, and dreams
All the emotions within myself
They are revealed into one picture
One form, one shape, made of many
It's almost to much to bear
Its a burden to look into
Too see all that i have been through
It's an image of myself
Yet I'd prefer to not be defined by it
Its a dark art to say my life forms such a picture
A picture so dampened and torn
A picture so unexplainable
Yet beautiful in so many ways
I see...I do see
I want to...but i don't want to
I wish to be blinded
Never again reminded
It hurts so much to look at
But i am fixed on this picture
What do i see tho...
what stands before me?
I see...I see
I can't speak
That's why i write
I see a casket
and a gun
I see his blood
I see my love
I see his blood stained body in the casket
I see my love fade
The light dimmed
My life darkened
I see...I see
I see blood
I see my own blood
On my own skin
I see death...near death
I see what would have been my own death
Life taken by my own self
I see faces
They are all staring at me for answers
I have none
I wait for answers from God
I get none
I see myself in a corner
Alone yet surrounded by many
My Blood is dripping
The pill bottle is empty
My stomach is growling and begging for food
I punch the mirror
I can't stand the girl i see
I do all i can to run from her
I want to be alone
But i see...I see
I see more faces taunting me
Snaring at me
I see a body shattered and torn
A heart ripped open
I see it all
But i can't speak it
I see HIS face bold as can be
Bolder than the rest
I see all he took from me
Abuse...physical, mental, sexual abuse
He stands out...HE is many
HE is Man
I see the word trust
Everything is shattered
Everything irreplaceable
Nothing renewable
I see a picture dark and beautiful
A picture with many scars and lots of holes
Yet there is time to fill those spaces
I see many pictures in one
It is the Kaleidoscope of my life
Author notes
Life is many stories in one. This is just a preview of mine!
A contest entry
- Scars by Diminished Capacity.
1900 points, ended November 25, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - What Defines You? by English.Muffin.
1300 points, ended November 17, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Round 2: OPEN FOR EVERYONE!!! AS WELL AS FINALISTS! by lesbian-in-love.
775 points, ended November 21, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Very interesting and i love the kaleidoscope imagery.
Great poem, with wonderful techniques.
Thank you for your entry
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This was interesting to read. It was well done. Thanks so much for entering and best of luck to you in the contest. Keep up the good work!
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T_T I can relate, not like thats what we need to talk about here.. but I love this piece it was raw and painful. <3kita
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So sorry you have had to go through such pain, but know that you are not alone. I suffered sexual abuse as a child, which left me with ptsd. If you ever need to talk, I'll be here. Great piece, you did wonderful with this. Thank you for having the strength to write about it and for entering it in my contest. I wish you all the best.
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I like it. Intense and truthful, even if it is hard to face. Many spelling errors, but other than that, touching. Even if that touch is cold. I enjoyed it.
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which words are wrong? I have dyslexia
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I take it back haha, it's mostly just grammar. Like "i" and "What do i see tho...", didn't fully spell out "though". Little things like that. Nothing really big.
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Oh, hon. I didn't go through sexual abuse I've gone through the others. I'm so sorry that you had to go through this hon.
Good luck and keep writing and I hope that It gets better for you.
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