No voice from heaven had been heard
(at least not with the human ear)
and yet the two had both been lured:
the Master's prompt had been quite clear.
The pieces -- providentially placed,
and words gained divine significance
'til every pawn the Knight would face
no longer joined him in the dance.
Unwittingly, the Rook had found
the Knight in close proximity,
but prompted by the Master's hand,
she allowed a vulnerability.
The Master moved strategically,
to answer him who placed the dare.
Who captured whom, a mystery
to Knight and Rook -- yet neither care!
Author notes
My first effort after nearly a year's poetic drought. Good to get the blood flowing again!
A small tribute to how I met and began dating mi novio, since the circumstances were interesting and clearly orchestrated by Someone else. 
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Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Ah Rhapunsel
What a romantic you are
All you need do is let down your hair
Tis up to you as when and how far
Then you will find if he really cares
'But that which is becoming cannot skip the present; when it reaches the present it ceases to become, and is then whatever it may happen to be becoming.'
And becoming you are........Bob 42
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He has seen the upside and the downside, my normal face and weirdness underneath when I remove the mask . . . he's totally a keeper.
And thank you. Good to hear from you again!
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Good
It's great! After almost a year to come back and write something so beautiful.
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I love this, it's such a good metaphor for a relationship. This is absolutely wonderful.
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wow
first effort moving in games and moving eieces so well...I can only conjecture what a flowing poetess would have beena year ago...what had happened that caused the drought...lol -
Bandit reading list
Great metaphoric write about relationships on the board of life, the complexities and joys that make the game exciting. Welcome back from your Haiatus, looking forward for more great writes from you dear Bandit!
Write On!
Brother Dennis
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Chess is a very interesting metaphor for love. It's thought-provoking, and made me ponder and reflect on your words. This is an amazing poem!
I can't imagine not writing for a year! The longest I've gone since I've started writing was about six months. But this is a wonderful return to the craft! I pray you can keep it up
Best wishes,
Zach Estel. -
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Well, I guess I should qualify that -- it had been almost year since I'd written any poetry. I'd been writing, all right, but exclusively papers for my college classes. Had to put out 2-3 2pg. essays plus an 8-page paper every month. I'm done with that now, thank goodness! And thanks!
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The romance of chess ... dear to my heart [see GRAND MISTRESS if you've a mind - just for interest, I'm not touting for comments!] http://allpoetry.com/poem/5868395 Not as endearing as your lovely piece I have to admit.
Mike
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Thank you. I shall check it out.
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What a fascinating metaphor for romances onset. I was totally caught off guard with the ending. I was drawn in from the first line even though it appeared to be a little cryptic. A well thoughtout and very unique poem which was a pleasure to read.
Bill
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Bandits Reading List!
Deeply intriguing; I'm drawn into this even though my brain fails to understand chess and its mysteries
I love the thoughts and ideas that seep from ink to my mind 
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BANDIT'S READING LIST
A good grounding in the art of playing Chess some quite good imagery involved, rhymed reasonably well
and flowed along in sympathy with the narrative
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this was very good. i love the metaphor in this. its induces a thought unlike most
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Interesting ...
but to avoid an inverted line: "til every pawn the Knight did face" (till, for future reference.)
(while knight and pawn met face to face
and neither joined him in the dance.)
and here: "she left a vulnerability."
I'd change to "overlooked a vulnerability".
I'd also change the ellipsis in the last line to the dash since it looks to me like that would work better.
Nice to see you back again. I hope all major problems are now resolved, and you can move ahead without the encumbrance of past disturbances.
There's a way, incidentally, that you can recover notes up to 80 pages, but the messages are, indeed, gone. I found that out the hard way myself.
The poem is fine, in the main, but the last line seems odd for a chess game. It would indicate a very absent-minded player, whereas most chess players are very dedicated and absent-minded is not a term I'd normally associate with them.
Anyway, hopefully we'll be seeing a lot more of you in times to come.
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Thank you so much! And incidentally, since the poem is a thinly-veiled reference to how I met my new guy, the last line matters less about chess and more about how the it really matters not to the pieces who was captured. I agree with you about the elispes at the end, though.
I will be tweaking the line about Knight and pawns -- I wrote the poem at a noisy Starbucks yesterday, and have never been happy with how it sounded. However, I'm wanting to convey that it was because of the significance of the words that the pawns were eliminated as dance partners (metaphorically speaking, naturally), so I might change "did" to "would" or "should." Neither supplies the immediate present tense I was hoping for, though. Ideas?
The Rook's vulnerability is intentional, as you no doubt gathered, but I'm not happy with the rhythm that "overlooked" adds to the line. I'll play with it, though, and see what I can do.
Anyhow, I very much appreciate the comment, and yeah, I'll be around much more frequently. It only took one poem to get my brain working again.
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I guess you could ...
use "established vulnerability" instead of "overlooked". That gets across what you want to say but sounds better, unless, of course, you're set on using "she" there.
As to the other, I am not thinking well enough just now to come up with anything else. Hopefully, after my operation on December 3rd, I will begin to feel better. However, there's no guarantee of anything in this life, so I'll just have to wait and see.
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The "she" I feel is quite necessary to the piece, but I can see what you mean. Thanks!
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