trying not to remember.

i know i was almost
not quite human,
numb, i just carried on
living,
alive, but not quite living,
just drifting.

what i still felt just finally
burned out tonight.
i realise i'm
not quite over you,
but i'm trying, not to remember.

if this is it,
this is getting over you,
it's taken time, but yes, i've cried,
myself out over you.

never again will i shed a tear
over you,
until the next time it hurts,
to remember.
i hate,
how it hurts to remember.

one day i'll just remember,
and i'll smile at we
once had,
and just remember
the times i cried over you.

and then i'll remember
the moving on.
the odd sensation of
life with out you.
when i learned to breathe again.

i gave up,
the fight all burned out of me,
because there was nothing
left, worth fighting,
nothing left anymore.

and i'll remember how much,
how much it hurt me,
when i remembered to learn how to feel,
how to feel alive,
without depending on you.