I write these letters on a night so fine
Finally my mind is calm
For now I have found one whose heart is mine
And places love in my palm
For now I know where my emotions lie
Near the moon I can now soar
For I have seen orbs of emeralds cry
Which is more than I can endure
I have also seen tears in ravens’ wings
And seen the moon’s face hang low
Never more, do I wish for such sad things
That fill me with helpless woe
Every time I look into your face
Radiance shines like the night
In brilliant streaks of beauty, hope and grace
Near the moon who glows pale white…
Author notes
This was written about a girl whom I care a lot for and is the sequel to my poem Ravens and Emeralds. She was having trouble and talking to me about something and I wrote this when she left my room. She and I care a lot about each other but we are taking things slow 
This poem was written on 10/27/09 at 1:30AM
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
that kind of poem that keeps with you in the back of your mind, i can only say that this was that kind of poem, keep it flowing
-
Authors notes are sweet and lovely poem wonderful and well done how sweet love is when its so pure and innocent
-
this is a wonderfuf write... A great Piece of Poetry...
JackReed3
-
yes the author's notes did help because i didn't quite see the direction where this piece wanted to take its readers. but hey, if it's from your heart, it's from your heart. sometimes you don't need the world to understand you. and don't get me wrong, it is a good piece with very a smooth and gentle flow.
-
hmmm... I like the flow of it all and it describes a very true emotion very simply with no frills but also with no thrills its good and after a few tweaks here there or the other place (i think the other comments noted where fairly well) you could have a great piece here
its good though
-
*yawn*, it's like every other teen love story. Exactly like every single other poem on this topic.
The tip says I should try relating this poem to an emotional response. The problem is, I felt absolutely nothing. -
interesting write Authors Note very helpful. the line "radiance shines like the night" sounds good but i am not getting the imagery... is it tears as in crying or tears like a rip or something? i think since it is raven's wings then tear/rip but not sure. Over all nice write though.
-
Very good
What do you mean by 'tears in ravens' wings'?
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
