Lost Behind A Mask

Brought up by my mother, taught to be polite and kind
Courteous and generous with a widely open mind
At any sign of trouble taught to run away and hide
Or go and find a grownup, someone I could confide

As you can imagine I got eaten like dessert
Every time I tried being nice, people left me hurt
Years of being tormented left emotionally scarred
Niceness is a weakness and the way I learnt was hard

As I got a little older things became apparent
The way these nasty people worked, soon became transparent
It seemed the only way to put an end to all my pains
Was to change my personality to fit in their domains

Slowly in the process I became another soul
Where my heart of gold once sat had left an empty hole
Years were spent as someone else, not an easy task
The real me sat there weeping hidden deep beneath a mask

Now that I’ve matured I’ve been reflecting on my past
Living in this double life, never could it last
I need to be myself again, honest and outspoken
But now I don’t know who I am
I’m lost,
Alone,
Confused
and broken