Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

dandelions are the equivalent of roses when we are little kids.

I waltzed behind fences of neighboring green yards,
just to find her the perfect dandelion.


I picked one with a brilliant yellow center,
just because it radiated smiles in my direction.


A friend asked why my search was so selective,
just to find a common weed.


And we ran three blocks to the playground,
just to feel unstoppable.


I wanted to give her something uniquely beautiful,
just to remind her who she is.


But my friend raced past,
just to push her high on the swing.





She still doesn't know,
just how special she is to me.








Author notes

Prompt: Dandelion; 97 words.

8 year old boy's POV
spot lightted (november 09 )

In a list

A contest entry

Tell me what you dislike, so I can edit.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Randomly Beautiful
    November 17
    Edit | Reply
    Lovely stuff.


  • Blue-Rose Beauty
    November 9

    Edit | Reply
    Whoa! Love the title first of all.


    I picked one with a brilliant yellow center,
    just because it radiated smiles in my direction.

    Aw, sweet lines.

    This is really good, thanks for entering.

    - Blue- beauty

    Strong finish.


  • crivanea silver member
    October 31

    Edit | Reply
    ohhhh...what a poem!! lol....i see both sweetness and sadness in this..the story of a childhood crush..wonderfully told

  • sharon duveau
    October 31
    Edit | Reply
    oh sweet!

  • firefly star
    October 31

    Edit | Reply
    i loved this and the images it formed in my head. It reminded me of when i was a child and it made me think of summer. thanks for sharing.


  • PrincessOfFire
    October 31

    Edit | Reply
    the innocense and gracousness of a childs heart of love. Nothing in this world can ever compare. Good luck but you dont really need it. Rose


  • Denerica
    October 31

    Edit | Reply
    I think every kid young and old a like took to the dandelion as a sentimental gift to our mothers and grandmothesr and even sweethearts, they have a wonderful fragrance actually and do represent a sunshine center, maybe it should earn it's right not to be a weed anymore, all sunshines in the grass. Beautiful words. Excellent. Blessings.


  • Cannonsfire
    October 30

    Edit | Reply
    It's a beautiful story, one that made me smile, my only crit would be to remove 'like forest gump' and leave the line at 'unstoppable' I think it reads much stronger that way. I do enjoy these retrospective ones C


  • Oh.My.Juliet
    October 30

    Edit | Reply
    OH
    MY
    GOD!!!


    This is my childhood right here! I LOVE this! Such truth and passion in this, I LOVE romantic love stories about young kids! and this is just wow, girl! THIS IS GOLD!!!!
    bookmarked. <3

1 - 12 of 12