The Enlightening

I could have awakened some very early morning, or
I could have been born of some different star,
Although I could not dispel that never abating darkness, that
Consumed my very essence,
Although born in the midwinter in the New Year when
The sun was shining brightly,
Born of a mother who donned an enlightening smile, and of
A father who carried the illumination of
Much love in his heart-
Oh, the dreams of that life they had for me and
So much hope-
Dreams for a future of prosperity, success, and enchantment, as
A tree that would grow tall and bear flowers that would
Brighten the lives of many and fruit that would be sweet and
Nourish the hungry-
It was when that dense fog obliterated the light of the sun that
Dreams transformed to nightmares-
A sorcerer’s bag of tricks were the witchcraft that
Transformed success to failure when that darkness overtook and
Those smiles, that laughter and hope were so
Rudely snatched away-
A fawn I was, starving and born with a broken leg that could not
Withstand the cold of this malicious planet and
Who could not survive the wild-
My heart was stolen so that I could not love, and my soul, likewise,
So that I could not feel warmth, peace and joy-
Darkness, and confusion became my way of life as
Blackness overshadowed my cosmos- and
The ones who had given me life?
Theirs were taken way as cruelly as eagles may be hunted down in the forest-
I realize on this very night, half a century later, as I sit,
Listening to rain spattering against the windowpane, as
I tap my fingers upon the wooden table in staccato rhythm-
Memories flood the back of my mind as it
Cries for its sanity-
Though now grown, my leg has healed, though crippled still,
I sometimes fall when I break into a run as
I search for my lost soul and my stolen heart-
I can feel the laughter of my determined spirit dispel that never ending bleakness, and
As I smile my lopsided smile,
I carry on with my tune although
It may be off key-
I dance and run-
Even though the pain still stabs my gut at times,
I sing praises that I am still alive, as
The stars in the evening sky, and the moon that
Hovers above the treetops outside shine some light
Upon my horizon –
Even though that rain
May continue to fall onto this world of madness-
I have found a glimmer of hope…

Claudia Krizay