Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Bite

Teeth rest upon
lower lip, exposes
desire. Tongue
teases, caressing
across smooth,
curved bone.
Gnaw on warm
flesh of another,
sink deeply into
the jugular, just
one more taste.
Beneath metallic
flavors flow.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • Debra A Baugh gold member
    November 13
    ?
    Edit | Reply

    vampiric in nature

    well-penned.....sound well-read into the subject at hand......gr8 read.....love peace & harmony


  • Uniquely Conformed
    November 13
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    beautiful way to describe the bite of a vampire. tender, loving, but deadly.


  • Leymi
    November 13
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    I really like the style. It's passionate but it seems distant and uncaring.
    My favorite lines:

    Beneath metallic
    flavors flow

    Keep writing!


  • evershine-90
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! numbing sensation, amazing write, it really captures the essence of a bite! the piece is very unnervingly exciting! I loved the way you have correctly put the commas to enhance the piece. Well done!