Father, do you ever feel ashamed of your mistakes that you made in the past?
I bet you don't care.
Only that you just regret putting me in this world.
That is why you never had claim me as your daughter.
Do you have shame?
You left a scared 18 year old girl with a child.
No, why would you?
Do you rejoice when you know there's a little girl who will never know you,
but your evil deeds?
Are you ashamed when you cheated my mom while she was 3 months pregnant with me?
No, at the time you were just thinking of that other woman.
Am I right?
Of course I am.
I know your mind.
Does it sadden you that your daughter has a terrible grudge against you?
No, it only saddens that you must pay child support.
Father I know that you will never answer my questions honestly.
The only thing that comes out of your mouth is lies!
Let me ask you this question again father.
Do you ever feel ashamed of your mistakes that you made in the past?
Author notes
This is about my biological dad who doesn't really care about me but money only.
A contest entry
- If not now, then when by krystal111.
1000 points, ended November 9, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Did I had grammer erros in this? Was it any good? Anything that I should reconsider revising?
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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brilliant write,very effective.........i hope this father really feel ashamed of his mistakes that he made in the past !!!
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Thank you for your comment
. I doubt he will ever feel ashamed of his mistakes that he made in the past.
-Jess
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Great vent here! Though the story is sad, there is some true sentiment within that almost makes it like a relief to get it out... I might be off.. But Just my feelings on it. Good luck with the contest!!
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Yeah in a way it was a great relief to me when I wrote this. Thank you for your comment. Love and Peace!
-Jess
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This is Amazing!! :)
I am ashamed if my mistakes..
you are really great,,
and i really Loved this!
Please keep writing.. -
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THank you I am glad that you love this. I will keep on writing and I was about to quit writing too. Thank you for your encouragemenn
. Love and Peace!
-Jess
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Wow. This one is very powerful. I loved your wording and the way you put so much passion into it. You should take a look at the rest of the poems entered, there all very impressive.
Best of luck.
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Thank you for the comment.
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"Ashame" should be "ashamed".
For a better effect, instead of "do you have ___" you can use "are you ___?"
Like, "Does it bring a smile..." can be "Do you rejoice when you know there's a little girl who will never know you?" but you can leave it as is.
Why, that's really sad. Sometimes, teenagers can be pretty stupid...but keep in mind, that there's a whole family out in your life, and here on AllPo that can replace that void.
You're good at monologging.
Wish I knew my biological dad. I'm a test tube child.
It's a really heartfelt poem, it's beautiful, but it's cold. It's ruthless, it's the kind of poem that jumps out at you when you're guilty. It ensnares, it traps, it reaches, it feels. We, the readers...we feel. It's the poem that is a light, you know the kind of light that illuminates, that forces you out of the darkness, that shines upon your evil deeds. It's that kind of light they use to interrogate. It's the kind of light that sets you free.
xDD I wrote a poem about my response to your poem. Sorry, I'm kinda, procrastinating my homework. xDD
Carry on.
-->pia♫♪
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Yes teenagers can be stupid. I became angry and just wrote out my anger on this. Thank you for pointing out my mistakes. I am so grateful for that. Thank you. You should read my previous poem. I would like to hear your opinion on that. I love your comments for some odd reason
Love and Peace!
-Jess
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