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Beautiful Lycan (Villanelle)

Her heart and soul are starting to crack
Alone on a mountain and buried in snow
The beautiful lycan without a pack

Forgotten by all as her hope fades to black
Nobody misses her warming glow
Her heart and soul are starting to crack

Her feelings are fractured and under attack
But from her frozen smile you'd never know
The beautiful lycan without a pack

She wonders forever: "What is it I lack?"
The signs of strain are beginning to show
Her heart and soul are starting to crack

The pain is worse than a slap or a smack
She just wants to fall to ravines below
The beautiful lycan without a pack

Her frozen spirit will never come back
Dying fast, but falling slow
Her heart and soul are starting to crack
The beautiful lycan without a pack

Author notes

In the form of a Villanelle. I'm not used to form poetry or rhyming, so any constructive criticism and tips on how to get better are welcomed and encouraged.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

  • angeldust88
    October 30
    Edit | Reply
    this is beautiful, the words flow so nicely. It's very good work.

  • JToddUnderhill
    October 27

    Edit | Reply

    Good attempt....

    ..... it's been so long since I have written in this form that I might be erroneous in telling you this however I believe that the center line in the first stanza should be the first line in the second and so forth, however you might want to google the Villanelle Form and see what that say to be more sure! I liked the read though!