I sensed your presence long before I viewed your blossoms fair,
Your essence drifted miles and more and woke me to aware,
My distant memory calls to mind the times when as a child
The fruits of all your labors hung like ornaments of wild.
I grew to learn that paradise is found where you prevail,
Like welcome signs that hang for life when other systems fail.
Alluring scent attracting bees that buzzed and whirled about
Then paused to sip your nectar sweet and take it home, no doubt.
‘Twas honey time the whole year round that graced my cup of tea,
And fresh made cornbread, toasted brown, with marmalade for me.
I guess perhaps that more was less when speaking of perfumed,
Your fragrance like the love of life quite fragile when entombed.
I sense your presence long before I see you with my eyes,
That essence drifts forevermore like dreams and changing tides ...
© 2009 Joy A. Burki-Watson
Author notes
A older poem of mine that I edited for "Naka Pillman" after reading about her love of something that is dear to my heart as well.
It was based on a story written by Myra Lochner aka Myrataal in tribute to Nika titled “Naka: Orange Blossom Nights” link: http://allpoetry.com/poem/5774457
A contest entry
- Naka Pillman -- The Star in the Middle by myrataal.
7000 points, ended November 15, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please take time to share your comments ...
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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You should do well in this contest because I am certain that Myra's eye for form and function will be drawn to this one like bees to blossoms. Penning perfection perhaps will procure the prize.
Sincerely,
Leo Long
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Beautiful!
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Very beautiful Joy, your flow and rhyme are unrivalled, always such a pleasure to read.
Toast and marmalade for tea, sailing ships upon the sea...!
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"hung like ornaments of wild."
This visual will stay in my mind,
as Nature's "decorations" filled
with tempting aroma and good health.
"And fresh made cornbread, toasted brown, with marmalade for me."
These lovely reminiscences flood my mind with warmth,
as does this entire piece, and the charming story
it was based upon.
This is lovely, joy, and happily in tune
for you use your favorite style,
rhyming all the while!!!!
M-C
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a very good composition; each line balanced as a song should be, with a rhyming
scheme of couplets. easy read because it flows naturally! a technical perfection!
i like this effort!
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People? Far from my love, lol
God, or a God, that's what I assume it's about.
I sensed your presence long before I viewed your blossoms fairNature of course being that gift, that "proof."
It's more than just nature, but about how that force imbues ones entire life, in the aroma, the taste, the essence of being.
That essence drifts forevermore like dreams and changing tides ...
Life changes, even ends, but that essence remains.
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Some very pretty imagery. I particularly enjoyed "Twas honey time the whole year 'round that graced my cup of tea" and "marmalade for me" which ties back in very nicely to the orange blossom theme.
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