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The Rainbow's Gift






A rainbow's frown,
a smile upside down,
is raining favour
on the ground
to those around.
A bad mojo waiver.






©2009
10-27-09

Author notes

Written for the contest: Contest Brevity. by Naridill
http://allpoetry.com/contest/2464907

A contest entry

A critical comment is invited

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Comments


  • Naridill gold member
    November 1

    Edit | Reply
    I think the last line seems out of place - perhaps a different line, just off top of head, savour could have found something more suiting, I feel. Apart from that - short & sweet. Goodluck.


    • Elrenia
      November 2
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for commenting. The last line was a smilie line.

      rous

  • Judith Chandler
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    Not sure about the last line, though it sounds good. "Favour" is an apt word here.

    Enjoyed your write.


    • Elrenia
      October 28
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you. Just a slight twist at the end. And, I needed a rhyme for favour.

      rous