The Shepherd asked for his true love
Because to him love was enough
To face this life that he does live
To her he longs, his life to give
He spoke to her in perfect verse
Speaking of beauty not perverse
And he claimed that nature sublime
Would praise their love at every time
He promised her the greatest things:
Coral, amber, and birds that sing
And in addition to all these
Flowers like roses and posies
Our shepherd is one pure and true
That teaches love to me and you
He owns nothing but sheep and mounts
But in the end his thought does count
Author notes
This was a writing assignment for my Intro to lit class. We had to take a poem and write it was a narrative, so I chose to write a narrative poem. This is off of "The Passionate Shepherd to His Love" by C. Marlowe. I hope you enjoyed my poem!!
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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interesting
very well done it has a very good flow that is simple and clear so it doesn't distract the reader
also the words are easy to understand which is good for a lot of people whos vocab is not as large it also continues in the style of simplicity that to me sticks out most in this piece
I haven't read the narrative by Marlowe but I think you did a good job on your piece
my only suggestion would be punctuation but that too may be intentional either way great job
keep it up
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You deserve more applause then this.
This is such a sweet perfect poem.
I wouldnt change a thing
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I did enjoy reading your poem. I think you earned an A. I believe this exercise your professor gave you is an excellent way to hone poetic skill. Is this an English Literature class? I seem to remember reading Marlowe's poem in college. If I recall correctly, I think it was in vogue in Marlowe's day to write a response to "The Passionate Shepherd to His Love." In fact, I may have also written one.
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this was something, i mean really i think you better get an A on this, if not i will have to go talk to that teacher, lol ,keep it flowing
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a very nice piece you got here. really liked the depiction of true, sincere and pure love. good work.
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humz.. very classic way of writing
old themes showing new looks
liked this calm piece of work
by
the poet of hearts and beautiful words
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Very nice
It contains a layer of thought. Human condition and to me a picture of the King who also was a shepherd. Humbling.
Were you trying to also keep with the way Marlowe wrote with the auxiliary verb, 'did'? It trips the reading a bit and shows a filler for meter only. However, as I said, if this was implicating his style, it is a good one.
The ending is clever but I would use another word besides 'thought' as it somehow does not pack the punch that the other stanzas lead up to.
Otherwise, very good! Thank you for your trust.
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I'm not familiar with the write this was based on, but it is a very pretty piece and well written. I am assuming you are talking about a shepherd literally and not the Lord. Forgive me if I am wrong. I like it.
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i like the sentiments expressed in the piece keep working as lit class can be heavy going. well done ! for a rhyming narrative check out my own
"daydreamer" aychellus
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well, I never read the origional piece but this was a so-so poem. Did your teacher want it to rhyme though? My teachers always did, because it is a literature class, and most professors don't consider free verse to be true poetry.
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