Regurgitated lies spoon-fed to me as if a craving baby bird. Swallowed like poison that ran through my veins in search of vulnerabilities. Promises of love and acceptance mixed with a battery of monstrosities at the hands of monsters. Pushing, pulling my insides until they were knotted and bruised – forever changed. I hated them. I loved them. Confusion scratched at my brain until my head belonged to them.
Driven to drink and drug – to pacify my fading conscience and dull the ache in my body. A friend I have found in an altered state. A state of I don’t care anymore. Do to me as you wish, and it becomes almost dream-like, almost pleasurable. I had my power back. You force your way inside of me and it feels just like the needle pushing into my vein – deeper and deeper – releasing its magic. I can deal with this. And I pass out all the same when you’re through. In my altered state.
Years have passed, but my altered state remains my one and only friend. There is no greater feeling than the needle and the ensuing burn. Cloaking me from reality, it saves me from myself and what would be truth. Something I dare not face. A killer. A lover of darkness. A lover of pain. Drink down my conscience until it, too, resides in my own hell. I am in hell. I will die in hell.
Author notes
P a l o s z o o
"Still Hurting" from: The Last Five Years musical.
Option 8
Write about something you're addicted to.
In a list
A contest entry
- 1000 points, 1000 pws by Shadow Anonymised.
1000 points, ended November 23, 1016 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - Just make it amazing! by X.brokenlover.X.
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Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Night rose
this is very good i like the emotion i got from this thanks for entering my contest good luck/
sincerly,
angel -
Ahhh this is cool, I've never heard of it before
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Wonderful in it's realness... Strong as it explains the feelings that turn the one who feels them into nothing. Beautiful, in every other way.
I know what your talking about here. My favorite line was 'There is no greater feeling than the needle and the ensuing burn.' It is so well placed, I when i read the this, I could feel the burn again.
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i like this, i love the first line the most
thanks for entering my contest
una -
thank you for entering
i really liked this piece and you have some amazoing writes, just fantastic. I love this piece again and its brilliant. Good luck and thanks for entering!
-penguin- -
"Drink down my own conscience until it, too, resides in my own hell." that line gave me chills. This was absolutely amazing and I loved every word of it. Thank you so much for entering and good luck!
~Betrayals *rose
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this is really good. it has so much emotion and sadness it in. and i love how you are so honest with yourself to except the fact that it is what drives you. amazing write. good luck in the contest and keep writing!
thanks for entering! (:
~~allie. -
Powerfully beautiful dark poetry and I have seen more and more of it on your page. Are you Ok? I love this genre but I care about you too.
Love,
Amera
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