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gladiolus

 

 

 

 

 

because love battles,
not only in its mispronunciations,
but also in the killing fields of hands,

look for me at the end of the slender stalk
of a lily, that sword of softness,
that rises from the religion
of its roots,

pushing and toiling,
till the flag of its whiteness
pierces soil,

 

shattering

the hostile defences of darkness,


who between my breast and love’s fragrance
want to impose their tongues
and fingers of stone,

with the wild peace of tenderness.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Our swords are taller than us, that is our tragedy
~ Nizar Qabbani

The word gladiolus (sword lily) means "little sword" in Latin.

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Comments

1 - 50 of 50

  • Stuart Higginson gold member
    2 hours ago
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    Too many lovely lines in this piece to pick one or two. The only thing I found myself questioning and perplexed by, was the ending. Considering the punctuation you used, it suggested you were referring to the hostile defences of darkness as those who both wanted to impose tongues and fingers of stone, and the wild peace of tenderness, rather than another possibility - of asking who might wish to impose their tongues and fingers of stone between ... (if that makes sense?).

    Then I considered that you might be saying the lily shattered the hostile defences of darkness with the wild piece of tenderness, in which case, I thought perhaps dashes ( - ) would make this clearer than using commas? ie to separate the text depicting the hostile defences, from the sword/lily, for example:

    "shattering
    the hostile defences of darkness -

    who between my breast and love’s fragrance
    want to impose their tongues
    and fingers of stone -

    with the wild peace of tenderness."

     

    I'm intrigued now, lol. If you can resolve the riddles I've raised, let me know

     

    "but also in the killing fields of hands," ... this was such a striking, powerful expression and image! To me, it spoke of how we ourselves can act foolishly, and must at times take a share of responsibility for misdeeds and misunderstandings that can see love wither against all wishes.








  • sheltered
    November 21
    Edit | Reply

    yup

    like i said...
    never

    this rocks!


  • Catie Sheeran gold member
    November 17
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    "who between my breast and love’s fragrance
    want to impose their tongues
    and fingers of stone" <--- my god, I love this piece!!!


  • michael thomas
    November 16
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    love that battles carelessly about
    splitting of adjectives and verbs
    competes with appreciations
    of gladiolus in Nicolette's words



  • Oisin silver member
    November 13
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    of is an attractive word! I see the silky softness of flower petals in this poem, the "wild peace of tenderness". As always Nic, wonderful.

    I wonder about the settings surrounding you during your writing, I think I will continue to be curious.


  • leander Moderators member
    November 13
    Edit | Reply
    This is so beautiful...


  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    November 12
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    Oh dear God this is beautiful...I am nearly speechless.


  • natari
    November 8

    Edit | Reply
    "the killing fields" line was powerful. I have said it before but here I go again. No other poet masters such tragic beauty as you.

  • abu nuwas
    November 7

    Edit | Reply

    A bit too classy for me....

    ....I always enjoy your words, and in this case think I grasped a little of the meaning --- oh, and thank you for the etymology of 'gladiolus', which I should have figured out years ago. I suppose it relates to the fairly stubby sword, which does indeed resemble the gladiolus when in leaf, before the flowers break out (a bit of a non=poetic spre point this year, as three of mine did not flower).

    I see you are interested in Neruda -- I cannot think of him without thinking of the film 'Il Postino', a propos of not much


  • CelticQueen
    November 7

    Edit | Reply
    You are a fabulous writer, Nicolette, so I know you are more used to gushing than to criticism. But being a fabulous writer, I'm also fairly certain that you are accepting of honest criticism. That's what I'm going to give you. I felt there were too many "____ of ___": "fields of hands"; sword of softness; religion of its roots; flag of its whiteness; defences of darkness; fingers of stone; Peace of tenderness. That's 7! They lost the emphasis that would normally have produced and became merely redundant. At least to this reader. celtic queen


    • Nicolette gold member
      November 7
      Edit | Reply
      i never even noticed all the "of's" - thanks for pointing that out!!

  • Virgoan
    November 2

    Edit | Reply
    Just reading this piece again. Beautiful and breathtaking.

    Fyi, I have seen gladiolus in pictures only.


  • manatee
    November 2

    Edit | Reply
    Well. Your "Gladiolus" is certainly a cut above. A poem fragrant with opiates of imagination. - The Manatee

  • Clelia
    November 1

    Edit | Reply
    We all need to have the wild peace of tenderness and understanding within us to overcome battles and the fingers of stone. It is written very well and tenderly, graciously urges the reader with its message.


  • Utok Bulinaw
    November 1

    Edit | Reply
    It has been a while. I almost given up on poetry but people like you inspires me to come back. Thank you for gracing me with your beautiful words today Nic. Misses you... Rhona

  • juno0404
    November 1

    Edit | Reply
    Congrats on the gold, this is a great powerful piece.
    Love your weapon of choice,what a way to fight.

    "who between my breast and love’s fragrance
    want to impose their tongues
    and fingers of stone,

    with the wild peace of tenderness."

    Loved this, how delicious.






  • Daizee silver member
    November 1

    Edit | Reply
    Beathtaking Nic... and so soft and full of meaning. You never disappoint


  • klassy lassy
    October 29

    Edit | Reply
    Your poem is regal, Nicolette, All the weapons we use to conquer darkness, and it just takes softness and the blaze of light to reveal love in an instant. I grow tired of "hostile tongues and fingers of stone," and think how impotent they are in "the wild peace of tenderness."

    The problem is, so often, it is self-imposed barabism in my own thought that creates the killing fields where I find myself wounded and waiting for

    "that sword of softness,
    that rises from the religion
    of its roots"

    ...Infinitely beautiful thoughts of insight in this royal writ.

    (My mother used to grow gladiolus. I have a picture of my sister, who is 5'4", standing among them. They grew higher than her head, in stunning corals, pale greens, and creams, some red. I always thought they were a strong flower, but never quite like this!)

    Karen

  • tara wilson gold member
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    excellent thought turned into beautiful poetry, it's always a pleasure


  • charcoal
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    a beautful poem.

    i'll be back. one read is just not enough.


  • Thomas Scott gold member
    October 27

    Edit | Reply
    The craftsmanship here is simply stunning. There are too many noteworthy lines to note but acknowledging love's "mispronounciations" is genius.
    After reading Lines 21 and 22 I updated my CV and sent it off to the recruiters at The House of Glad and applied for a job.
    This is delicious poetry from a delicious poet.

    Tom


  • Jersene gold member
    October 27

    Edit | Reply
    you are definitely a poetess of flowers...you take their beauty, and give them more beauty and meaning. Gorgeous penning


  • Rainydaywoman
    October 27
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful imagery and flow of sentiment. Loved it!


  • glennwood
    October 27

    Edit | Reply
    "with the wild peace of tenderness" kind of makes me think of crazy wisdom. There must be a great intensity in the openess of that kind of peace. No wonder this poem won gold.


  • Storminbrenda silver member
    October 27

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    Wonderful read thanks for sharing


  • ccawley gold member
    October 27

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    Congratulations..."religion of its roots"...wonderful


  • Amera gold member
    October 27

    Edit | Reply
    This is truly a wonderful read and so well deserving of the gold trophy it's wearing. I think this is so profound as I got different things out of it with the second and third read. Bravo!

    Love,
    Amera


  • Allyce May gold member
    October 26

    Edit | Reply
    My Dad used to grow the most gorgeous gladiolus in the garden when I was younger - I have pictures of me sitting next to a vase of them when I was probably not even two years old; they were much, much taller than me

    Anyway! Enough my by childhood memories, lol. Nicolette, this is a much harder side of you, and I like ittttt. I really don't know how you do it, lol. Your writing is elegant, graceful, simple, precise, and it either cuts to the bone or pierces the heart. When I read you I am constantly reminded how far I still have to go, but your inspiration brings me just a little bit closer

    Effective use of language here to convey that "battle" - the killing, the tolling, shattering, impose. This makes me think of a woman putting her foot down. Yes, keep fighting for beautiful things lovely Gogo


  • SabaSophiya
    October 26

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    Your imagination is gorgeous! Lovely title and it empowers the write. Great job!!


  • arafura gold member
    October 26

    Edit | Reply
    "who between my breast and love’s fragrance
    want to impose their tongues
    and fingers of stone..."

    Congratulations on the gold. I'm not surprised you won with this delightful poem. Bravo!


  • IronIcecream
    October 26

    Edit | Reply

    yeah the romans did not have the little sword complex like other nations
    their women were probably emancipated in more other ways...


  • Matt E. Smith gold member
    October 26

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    this could not possibly be more perfect. like all of your poems there is this definite softness but underlying is a stark vulnerability. well worthy of gold


  • Night Hope gold member
    October 26

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    Ahhh, Nic...your first three lines, your final four lines...and every one in between...Sheer beauty, tenderness and magnificence, of course. Congratulations on winning the gold in Hensley's contest, my dear Friend. This is gorgeous. Vlindertjie


  • Cannonsfire
    October 26
    Edit | Reply
    stunning... C

  • Virgoan
    October 26
    Edit | Reply
    Excellent! I see this poem as a symbol of how love conquered and was conquered. The past, present and probably the future faces of love and how it'll be. Love is playing in the playgrounds of yin and yang.

    In addition, the diction is perfect to the bone.

    I need to breathe...honestly.

    Thanks for sharing.

    HENSLEY


  • ten thousand cicadas gold member
    October 26

    Edit | Reply
    This is really quite stunning. You piece portrays the heart with such delicacy. "because love battles"... what an incredible opening. As I read through this, I was reminded that "a soft answer turns away wrath". You have truly captured the power and beauty of peace with such tremendous intensity.

  • Eusebius
    October 26

    Edit | Reply
    Flower(s) and love make for a most potent combination in poetry and this poem is really quite excellent in every way! I just loved it... I do not think I would change a thing in this verse...


  • marc creamore
    October 26

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    Nicolette . . . once again you bless us with a flower poem, a poem of such deep petalled and spiritual intensity . . . the last line is incredible . . .

    Marc


  • Howl- gold member
    October 26

    Edit | Reply
    great read! excellent flow. your words cascade, like a waterfall. easy to read.
    cheers


  • quietly burning
    October 26

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    beautifully written and in what seems to me, a completely new tone and texture.

  • Yvette Champ gold member
    October 26

    Edit | Reply

  • Rowan gold member
    October 26

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    Only you could start a poem with because
    and answer it with such beautiful wisdom. sighs.


  • NurseChilly gold member
    October 26

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    yes it does and survives all manner of small cuts, bumps and bruises.. it is as beautiful and as careful as sword in it's sheath...
    yes

    beautimous!!!


  • wbiro gold member
    October 26

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    the entire poem has consonant end-lines... were you doing that as an exercise/challenge- trying to write a 'soft' poem with 'hard' words?

    I do see that the last line offsets the rest of the poem; the body speaks of 'hard'- with battle, killing, sword, flag, defense, 'impose', stone... even the gladiator-like title... then the last line lets the sun shines through the dark storm clouds with 'peace' (albeit still a wild peace after all that bloody chaos! )

    Ah, illustrating the dichotomy of the flower- a delicate thing, with such a violent name... (makes one wonder who named it)... but nice to get to the roots of words...


  • ccawley gold member
    October 26
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    I love to read your gorgeous poetry.!


  • Randomly Beautiful
    October 26

    Edit | Reply
    I want to go on that walk...sigh.

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