I was perfect when we met, the embodiment of everything you wished to hold and cherish. You plied me with whispered endearments, tender messages, and lavish entertainments. Like a warm quilt, you covered my imperfections with soothing sentiments and hushed anxieties with kisses.
I wanted to believe, wanted to trust that you could sweep away the darkness with tender hands, wave away snowflakes and shelter me from storms. Perhaps you believed it too.
Your sorcerer sensibilities grew with macho maneuverings, attempting to fit my tomboy frame into Barbie’s plastic mold, crawling into my brain to peck at insecurities. Nature’s miracle, the only man never to err, you shoved me aside as immaterial, scooping out my center to fill with concrete certainties.
Maneuvering illusions, you reflected and deflected my wants, hiding yourself in satin cloaked subtleties, seeking only surrender.
My thoughts were wrapped in foggy dreariness; decisions proved too difficult to make, and I could not respond to stimuli that sought to pull me gently from my shell. I only wished to have a cleansing weep, but these dark clouds taunted and defied. They hid the warmth with chilling frailty and offered precious little in relief.
I let myself escape through opened pores, watching me puddle at your feet. My amorphous essence lay there awaiting the heel of your boot, and I felt raindrops. Unlike the Wicked Witch, the wetness of my own despair gave me life. I felt the storm rise from my huddled hopelessness, exploding from my mouth and piercing you with lightening bolts. Shocked, you lashed out as if I gave a damn. Accustomed to acceptance you were blind to Circe, my inner Goddess, who relegated you to braying ass; the Mighty Oz a figment of your fantasy life.
Author notes
prompt: "You picked at ruddy faults,
until, alas, my blind eyes wept thunder."
from "the art of betrayal" by tsukiyo:
http://allpoetry.com/poem/5471825
In a list
A contest entry
- the ethereal rounds iv;; survival of the fittest. ♥ by Immortal Obscurity.
3500 points, ended November 5, 5 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
How do you think I could improve this poem?
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Great write I remember seeing Wizard of Oz as a kid many moons ago. congratulations on silver.
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haha...funny..i've never seen the wizard of oz although i've lived in KS for 6 years
and at first i thought you were referring to Seattle..the title prompted me to read this 
well done ..i love the allusion in this one
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I enjoyed writing this prose piece because it seemed easier to punctuate than my usual freeverse. I don't know how you have managed to live through the holiday season without seeing this movie at least once. I loved all the Oz books when I was younger and I can't wait to read them with my son. Thank you for your comment. Peace, Liz
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Wow this is amazing! I suck at prose and truly admire anyone who can wru=ite it like this. I live the sensitivity you wrote this with and the sadness that flowed beneath. 'crawling into my brain to peck at insecurities' I love that image, like someone finding all the faults and feeding on them.
Then, right at the end, your strength really comes to light and your ending is one of a strong and vibrant soul.
Best wishes with this
gaylene
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Thank you so much Gaylene for your wonderful comment. I don't write much prose and I find that I really like it. It's rather like freeverse with different formatting, and it's actually easier for me to punctuate.
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Well Homer, Oz...as Ecrivain would say..a tour de force; prose becomes this writer it os poetic prose, the lines have a sort of cadence and it builds to the resounding conclusion, a positive and affirming conclusion...excellent...PK
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Thank you PK. I haven't written much poetic prose since college but I enjoy the rhythm of it. I am able to expand freeverse and write complete paragraphs. It is enjoyable to take a thought and run with it.
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Wise-Wonderful-Profound...
Outstanding imagery and lexicon in "the Emerald City doesn’t dazzle anymore" give its contents their glorious picture. Magnificent composition.
In respect and admiration,
Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU
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Thank you so much for your fulsome praise. I love using more complicated language and prose seems the perfect format for that.
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