I’d like to tell you all a tale about a dog that ate a snail
But not just any snail by far – he was the next Olympic star
For Joe had trained this snail just right and fed him only vegemite
And vegemite it made him run – Lord, he could out run anyone
Joe found him in the garden shed and thought the creature was quite dead
Picked him up and tossed him far – he landed near a vegemite jar
That stood aside the recycle bin that Joe had not yet put there-in
It’s lid not quite on top and tight - invitation to the vegemite
Joe went about his chores that morn forgot the snail there on the lawn
He didn’t see the snail rise and climb that jar with great surprise
For there inside the snail found a taste that almost knocked him down
His head did spin – his eyes popped out and he began to run about
Joe came out and saw the snail do two laps of the garden pail
Then up the wall he ran so fast leaving Joe a little aghast
A snail that’s speed was next to none – was born to run and run and run
And so Joe thought he’d train the snail and set him on the Olympic trail
And train he did both day and night the snail until he was just right
The snail could now run laps around Joe’s mangy dog – his jealous hound
That saw the Joe had given to this snail attention through and through
And planned to see this slimy thing would never be Olympic king
He waited ‘til Joe went away and then he made his final play
Found that snail all snug and tight inside the jar of vegemite
Coaxed him out onto the ground and gobbled that Olympic snail down
And that was the end of all Joes’ glory and also to this little story
25.10.2009
In a list
A contest entry
- Zany Animal Humor by mgmc.
700 points, ended October 27, 11 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
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Such a funny poem ,can just imagine that snail in the olympics lol!
Made me smile from begining to the sad end.
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Thanks, mate. I am glad you dropped by.
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A well deserved winner if ever there was one.Your poems really do cheer me so.My daughter is dyslexic and its one of my great sadnessess that poems and reading are a chore and not a pleasure for her,but when I read her yours,she really enjoys them.You ought to think about publishing them.Montey
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Thank you so much for your lovely comments and I am so glad your daughter likes them to. It makes me feel good to know that someone has got some pleasure from them. I am thinking of compiling for a book as I have already found a publisher to send them to.
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Vegemite Urrrrr now i know why a snail would run away from the awful stuff, though why a dog would eat such a beast after feasting on it I have no idea.Marmite Yes now your talking.A wonderful humourous poem and well worthy of it silver award
Excellent
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LOL!!!!!!!Thanks, Legend. I actually thought of you when I wrote this piece and thought you might enjoy that vegemite bit!
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This is so cute I enjoyed reading with great humor ! Congrats on the silver it was well deserved
Thank you for sharing 
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Thank you.
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Wow! Zany humour and imagination and a great read, though I was hoping the snail would escape in the end, or at least make the dog a bit sick!
Am about to check out your profile to see if I'm right and you're a fellow Aussie. Who else would use Vegemite in a poem??!!
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Thanks, mate! Glad you liked and yes, I am a fellow Aussie indeed.
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How fun! Love the story and internal rhyme. Congrats.!
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Thank you. Much appreciated.
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Wow! This is quite an amazing little story. Its structure is awesome. Its premise is definitely zany! Don't know about vegemite first hand but have certainly heard of it!
I'm in awe of form - what is it? Great entry--thanks and best of luck!
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Thank you so much for the wonderful silver trophy. I don't enter many contests so this was awesome.
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LMAO~~ this is simply the cutest...i could just see this man power of a wee snail doing push-ups and racing around that jealous dog...
dear one do keep them coming such an enjoyment to read
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Thank you, my friend. I think the rhyme here and there was a bit off but maybe later, I will improve it.
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Excellent tail of a snail..
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Thank you. I tend to get a little silly at times.
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Don't go letting the Americans into the vegemite secret! That's our secret weapon!
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LOL!!!!!!!! Your right! I completely flipped my top, didn't I? Thanks so much for reading and I will catch up with you on the weekend.
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It surely will be no surprise I'm glad this snail met his demise
for Joe might well have bred this critter creating snails, stronger -fitter
my hatred for these little beasts who on my flowers all like to feast,
I make no secret of that's why, this pesky snail deserved to die.
Of all the pesky garden pests it's slugs and snails I hate the best
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Thanks mate and your little piece was sensational. Got a great laugh from that. You could almost start another about them.
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VERY CUTE!!!!!!!
Aw, poor little ol' snail!
Jealousy will always be even with everyone in the animal world! 
's
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Thank you. Yeah, you're so right. Don't know what posessed me to write this. LOL!!!!! Catch you on the weekend.
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Haha this is just wonderful! You always manage to write such amazing stories and this is a beauty Love the whole thing and the rhyme and flow are spot on! best wishes with this
Gaylene
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Thanks, mate. I don't enter many contests but when I saw this one, I couldn't resist. I also wish you the very very best with your wonderful piece which I know they will love.
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what a cute story!
i really enjoyed the tail of the lil snail and his oh so poor demise.....lol...!
great job!
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Thanks, sweetie. Glad you liked this. I will catch up with you on the weekend when I am not working. Just on a while tonight cause JJ has gone to bingo.
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