Thinking About....

Sometime you think that you were born at the right time and then you think about it later and, well, sometime you think there ain't no right time to be born at all. 

I was born at the downfall of mankind, the Atomic Age.  And when I became aware of my time, I thought the worst of times was gone.  Movies showed that Gene and Roy had pretty well defeated the corrupt bankers and, well, Jimmy Stewart running through the snow testified that "It was a  Wonderful Life". 

Sure there was the House on Un-American Activities and Joe McCarthy running around talking about commies and reds and threats to the nation; but, there was also unions and Edward R. Murrow and for the most part things seemed in balance.  There was radio and rock n roll and then came the age of TV. 

TV changed time.  It changed memories.  Suddenly what we knew was what we had film of and all the pictures in the World War book that sat on my family's coffee table was forgotten in favor of "You Are There" and "See It Now".  Memories had to have motion to be real memories.

Thus it was in 1968.

I was living in San Francisco in a Geary Street apartment with nothing but a radio.  The whole world was outside when I learned that Robert Kennedy was killed.  And suddenly all communications just died and everything became static to me.

So later I went to college with a constant buzzing in my ears and  with the knowledge that the world is not what it appears.

Thinking about that I can see my pessimist's paradigm, knowing I am out of phase with even my own time.  Knowing that I can never really break out or truly know what it or any part of IT was all about.