The Eiffel Tower is awash
in light-shows and music --
while in Iowa it rains and rains,
thunder crashes and a cold wind blows.
Centuries of pentimento *
have covered canvases in layers of deceit,
while fudged contours and overbold brushstrokes
seem powerless to prevent "bleed through" clues
to crimes conveniently forgotten,
especially by their perpetrators.
Literature languishes in a wasteland
that limns the shell-pocked moonscape
extant between the "botched civilization" of Pound
and the Bell Jar nihilism of Plath.
The 21st Century seems bogged down
in irrelevancies.
Faux fundamentalists flog homosexuals
with their foul, forked tongues,
forgetting in their fervor
that the Renaissance and most of the civilization
they claim to be defending
rests solidly on the shoulders
of two gay-boys from Florence:
Michelangelo and Leonardo da Vinci.
A black man holds the White House in trust
for a nebulous future --
and gets no credit for his yeoman's job
in preventing another Republican Depression.
As usual, the perps got off scot free,
the wheels keep on turning,
and Americans refuse to read.
But ... the Eiffel Tower is awash
in light-shows and music --
and in Iowa, a cold wind blows.
Author notes
* Pentimento is what it's called when a painter paints over a portion of a picture to cover up a "mistake", but doesn't use enough paint, so that the portion covered up gradually bleeds through later. There's a famous example of a hatbrim done by Rembrandt, as I recall, so that the hatbrim is doubled.
The referendum in Maine is getting on my nerves. I couldn't help sticking in a reference to the fundies I loathe and despise so much. I do not believe they are Christians in any sense of the word, and I think Christ would abhor their sick ideas as much as I do. I've known lots of good Christians, but as far as I'm concerned, fundies are fake Christians.
A contest entry
- Immortal (For Marc Creamore) by just rob.
40000 points, ended November 22, 42 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
What did you think?
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
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Wow. This gave me chills. For me, the second, fourth, and last stanza made the poem (with the fourth stanza being the response to the second). I really should have read this earlier. The way you used "pentimento" in relation to society is genius:
while fudged contours and overbold brushstrokes
seem powerless to prevent "bleed through" clues
to crimes conveniently forgotten,
especially by their perpetrators.The fourth stanza is a bullet. The alliteration and the pointed irony of "fundamentalists" having "forked tongues" makes this part of the poem artistically and socially effective. At this point, I had a knot in my stomach.
And then that ending. Uhg. So haunting.
I regret that I didn't read this when you first linked me to it. Great piece, Jim. I'm so used to reading your verse poetry; I didn't expect this. What a powerful poem...
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Mille fois merci ...
I normally don't do much free verse. I was just too ill at the time to write a sonnet (which Rob had requested, but hopefully he didn't mind.)
For some reason it's very difficult for me to write when I'm not feeling well.
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The second stanza just blew me away. The whole work is a representation of loving and loathing, both in their worst and best forms.
"and in Iowa, a cold wind blows."
indeed.
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I should have said "damned cold" ...
but that's another story.
Thanks for stopping by.
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This made me feel sad, as if I was watching that rain fall on every human who scurries from place to place yet never knows just what the hurry is for and perhaps if they did, they wouldn't care anyway. Every great height we achieve we cut down with a waste of life or ignorance to suffering and most say oh well what can I do...that makes me angry and frustrated that no one understands to be alone with a voice still can have a measure of change but if stood in a crowd with all voicing the same thing we may indeed fasten the pace. The world's next generation are more informed than we,one would hope they will keep the roar going.
C
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One does like to think ...
that the future will be better, and I suppose that, too, is a universal attribute of human nature. However, it seems as if something always manages to come out of nowhere and blindside us. Still, things are looking better now than they have in years, so maybe there's some justification for hope.
We can cross our fingers and hope for the best.
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Hmmmmmmm.....
.... .....Let's see. I have cheated a bit, and read other comments before providing my own exegesis, or odd thought, more accurately. It seems, like so much, to be America-centred. The world is bigger than that, and often, viewed from abroad, Americans seem to have a down-right parochial view. Yet this one actually refers to France, and Sylvia Plath, so it is in the higher echelons from that pont of view. ( I just waded through Path in a local cafe, and she regularly ruined my cappuccino). Regarding the gay thing, I used to take the view that I didn't care what they did, so long as it didn't frighten the horses. But when people get into campaigns, they never stop: we now have a system where they can be registered as Civil Partners, but that is not enough. If two lesbians somehow have a child, a law has been passed so that the name of the father will not appear on the birth certificate. I worked with a couple of gay men, and it was clear that this had become a hobby, an obsession and to all intents and purposes, a profession, certainly a creed. I became bored with their excited discussions of 'cottaging' the night before, or micro-penises and such. Well, there you are: an old Nazi homophobe in disguise!
As to the poem, the second verse, for me, stood out a mile; excellent, and i think because it is of universal application: the other matters will come and go.
I was fascinated to see that some survey on AP found that 70% of people had not heard of Walt Whitman. I wonder what percentage can spell reasonably, and write in vaguely grammatical fashion? I thiink 15% would be optimistic-- and these are people who are interested in words! What of the general population?
Sorry for the rant
E
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Of course ...
I am an American, and I suppose that does shape my worldview, although I don't know that I share any intrinsic Narrowness of vision because of it.
I grew up in Missouri, and white people there looked down on black people, and that was a rather mild way of putting it. My mother and my father did not share in that type of bigotry, and we were taught while growing up that the U.S. is the land of the free, and that freedom is not fettered by disgusting bigotries. In other words, Thomas Jefferson was right, and all men are created equal, etc., etc.
It never occurred to us to think differently, even though we heard it in every conversation and saw it in every action of the white people surrounding us. There are many things I dislike about people who are different from myself in one way or another, but I believe that those things which are genetically determined are not things which common sense allows decent people to base bigotry on. The color of one's skin, who one chooses to love, whether one is blond or has brown hair, has blue or brown eyes, etc., are all genetically determined, and thus not susceptible to that type of bigotry. Consequently, I can't really understand intrinsically those things that bigotry uses, such as they aren't like us, kill them.
That does not mean that I like every member of every group I meet. I simply judge people based on what they are and how they act, as individuals. If someone comes to me and makes a statement against someone based on one of those criteria, I tell them I don't like bigots and to leave me alone.
Otherwise, I normally just work on making it through one day to the next. Life is difficult enough without going out looking for things to make it more difficult.
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We agree
My grand=daughter, for whom I would give my life, is herself mixed race. And people seem to have an extraordinary capacity for whipping up hatred, even between football teams. But I do some times wonder whether there is any purpose in bashing Mr X for being racist -- what is it in humans that makes us so? Is that genetic? Has a million years of development told us that if we see an unknown creature -- a giraffe, a snake, a gorilla, a man who looks nothing like you, and speaks some strange tongue, and may do who knows what--has that told us to be on guard?
I do not know what ails you but I hope you get plenty of respite.
E
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Wonderful insight into the 21st century and how far we have advanced while standing still. So much truth in this poem, all the wrong things get attention nowadays. An enjoyable and informative read. Good luck in the contest.
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Yes ...
just think of all the time and craziness that went into the balloon boy stories. There are horrible things happening everywhere, but the media spent an amazing amount of time on a non-story / hoax which was of no importance to anyone.
It's really enough to make you crazy just in itself.
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Fitting
It is only fitting that the first poem I read here is yours. It seems like yesterday that you brought me into this community. I think you know how close I was to quitting at that time, that, but for your encouragement and friendship, I would have quit before I knew this is what I was to do, what I must.
Among other things, I just loved the way you brought this full circle; the cold wind, the tower, awash in the garish stain of neon and noise. Very well done.
I can never thank you enough...
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Nor can I ever thank you enough ...
for the poem you wrote for Pat. It meant a great deal to her, and since she lived such a short time after that, I think it was immensely more important to her than anyone could ever know.
I believe that you were meant to be a poet, and nothing would have stopped it. If I hadn't been there, someone else would have stepped up to the plate and said, wait a minute, you are not a quitter, and wouldn't even know how to go about it.
Quitting is not your style, mon ami.
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That poem was the most difficult one I ever wrote. The task seemed impossible. I don't think I wrote it. I had no idea how to cheer up someone in her position. Then suddenly, my hands typed it out, five minutes, one draft, as if sombody else were in control. Today, as I plumb the depths, I often go back to read it, to find solace.
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I don't suppose ...
you could send me a copy of it? I thought I had one, but can't find it. This place is a horrible mess, with so much stuff stacked up, records, books, dvds, vhs tapes, cd's and Lord knows what that I could have a copy here that's buried so deeply I might not live long enough to find it, but it would be nice to have a copy.
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I am with you in sentiment. I'm sick and tired of Republicans, homophobes, and ignorant people in general. Very timely words.
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Seems like there was some television personality ...
who used to say "They're everywhere. They're everywhere". Unfortunately, I can't remember who that person was.
Anyway, lately, it seems like they really are everywhere. I always thought ignorant people reproduced like everybody else, but there must be something else going on because every time I turn around, I'm running into another one of them. -
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He's everywhere, he's everywhere!
There was Chickenman on the radio in the 60's. I listened to it religiously. My friends were always talking about Chickenman. -
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Thanks. ;)
I never heard it myself, but I had a friend who was always saying that. He obviously listened to the same show you did.
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Brrr. What a chilly lesson. I'm glad to see words from you, and especially such insightful one. I find I've done almost as much "reading" as I can, at least of what passes for current news. I live in the worlds of fiction, and glean most of my knowledge of current events from SciFi & fact stories and articles that include social commentary.
It took me a long time to learn my nature as an HSP (Highly Sensitive Person - a concept developed by Elaine Aron http://ww w.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=highly+sensitive+person&x=0&y=0 ) means I get very easily overwhelmed by all the distressing details of the mundane world. Yet I [i]still[/i] feel guilty that I cannot be more of a responsible citizen in this regard (at least as regards my personal definition of such).
A good write, that obviously made me think and reflect.
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Gay marriage ...
is not a cause I have cared about or supported heretofore. I think there are far more important things to occupy my time. However, I am sick of people being discriminated against solely because of who they are. Such things should have gone out with Hitler and the Third Reich. It is exactly like the prejudice against the Jews. You notice that modern bigots choose the same people to discriminate against that Hitler did. Makes you wonder about what kind of people they REALLY are, doesn't it? Besides I was very impressed with the 77 year old Republican War Veteran and his You Tube volley against that kind of bigotry.
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I recently read a poem that mentioned palimpsests, so your mention of pentimento is a timely one, Jim.
I don't think literature is languishing as much as it's being largely ignored. After all (and I think we've discussed this before), AP had a poll where over 70% of the respondents had never heard of Walt Whitman, so it does make one wonder just what it is that they are teaching in schools anymore. I gotta agree with you about the so-called "fundamentalists" (sans the "mental" part, in a lot of instances)...I, too, have known some regular folks who were what I would consider to be "good Christians", but it seems only the extremists get any press these days.
My pet peeve has always been the Holy Joe televangelists who cry out for Grandma to send her pension check if she wants God to answer her prayers. 
People like that oughta be put on display as to how not to act if one wants to be considered religious or caring. Anyway...I also enjoyed your reference to Plath and agree that she's not too easy on tender and as yet undeveloped young minds. All in all, an excellent diatribe, worthy of Rob's perusal. I know it'll make him smile, that you were able to enter in spite of feeling poorly these days. So, best of luck in the contest, Scribe. Well done and amen!
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Yes ...
but he wanted a sonnet, and I can't rhyme when I'm not feeling up to it. I had to resort to free verse. Anyway, if he doesn't like it, he can kick it to the kerb.
I never win his contests anyway, so I can't possibly be disappointed, no matter what happens.
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well, where do we begin when we must begin again, the streams of logic we have sailed upon for a lifetime seem to have come a-cropper, run completely dry. The Second Depression has come and the man at the helm somehow sails across the sea so tranquil there is no water is has been ruined, melted like the Poles; the Gods seemed to have inhaled the winds needed to fill the sails, we have bailed the rich man's Yacht...and yet somehow, we move onward , probably upward. Maybe, the cycle of war and dependence on things that that go BOOM to feed our economy is ending, maybe a few more years to give peace a chance to take root, No maybe's about this poem though, it is splendid...a wonderful and refreshing splash of what i think, is reality...PK
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Yes ...
"the times they are a changin'" ...
and we can only hope it will be for the better.
Thanks for the kind words and for stopping by.
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A very rich and unusual poem - I love the art metaphors and the Sylvia Plath reference. The words have a musicality and natural rythym that's not often seen. Nice and cynical! Great work (Y)
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You're a very astute ...
and intelligent young man. And I sincerely hope that you quit reading Sylvia Plath tout de suite. She seems to have an unhealthy influence on young people.
I'm rather bemused at how quickly you found my poem, since I just posted it such a short time ago. How did you find it, if I might ask? -
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Thanks - Plath was a good poet, but I doubt she's going to influence me to stick my head in an oven.
And I just found it when I clicked on "Read" - it just appealed to me
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