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Release

 

 

 

           Release

 

 

 

 

 

I kept you in my pen for years -

Squirming, writhing, making

My palm sweat.

I let you out a trickle at a

Time when I held you like a

Glass slipper in a torrent

Or a time when you were honey

In the wintergreen - symphony.

I let you out to scream like god

As you split like amoeba

To bear Venus to my arms.

I let you out to paint

You in the river, to frame it

In yellow, to stroke you with

Words for water over stone.

Now I release you to lean close

To hear my last poem.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

100 words, exactly.

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • tara wilson gold member
    December 1
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    I love the tone of your voice - amazing work and I love the way the poem unfolds until the exorcism felt within the last lines and your pen.


  • Andre ben-YEHU
    November 12

    Edit | Reply

    Eternally grand...

    I have enjoyed the reading of "Release"... Its impressive imagery and symbolism did make me stop on the road of imagination, and enjoy this fantatstic motion picture.

    In respect and admiration,

    Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU

  • Virgoan
    November 9

    Edit | Reply
    Should I begin by saying that this is brilliant? Yes, brilliant! I loved how rich this poem is in its brevity. The progressive voice and the enthralling effect makes me think and search for words of splendour. Definitely a finalist.

    This poem is really really beautiful.

    Thanks for sharing.


  • ShaShay
    November 6
    Edit | Reply
    Outstanding. I see nothing in need of revision. Good luck in the contest.
    Sharon


  • Naridill
    October 28
    Edit | Reply
    Stellar!


  • a line of poetry
    October 24
    Edit | Reply
    Good poem, by the way.


  • a line of poetry
    October 24

    Edit | Reply
    I knew I'd find you here. Long time no see, or hear. Check your facebook once in a while, dude. Hey, let's get togehter, eh.

    Wish me luck, I've applied at the Reader. If I get it back I'll try to bring back poetry. Also, applying at Evergreen Review. If I get that postion I'll be in heaven.
    ]

  • Rowan gold member
    October 23
    Edit | Reply
    There's nothing I can say...


  • Cannonsfire
    October 23

    Edit | Reply
    Well I love the ending as long as it isn't true??? There are too many words in that pen of yours to quit and too many moments I have left to read the words C


  • marc creamore
    October 23
    Edit | Reply
    Once again you have touched me in those hidden places, those places where the majority fear to tread.

    Marc


  • Night Hope gold member
    October 23
    Edit | Reply

    I just love this poem.


1 - 11 of 11