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chemical waste burns us into oblivion

I never knew you could love someone with such powerful hate


How when you stand inches from my body
I can feel the heat of lust and anger mixing
together. It's like a chemistry set exploded
with in my heart.

                            hazard mess is the best description of what we are.


Maybe one day this atomic wasteland will once again hold life,
how the heartbeats song will be heard in the dead of night and
crickets will sing a symphony. And for once a planted seed will
grow into a tree were its fruit will loose its bitter when bittersweet.

But that
day is not
today.

There are too many storm clouds
and too much chemical waist.
burning our soul and removing
our fingerprints.

So for the time being I will
avoid you like the plague
until I find a cure for this
love sick cancer;

and until you learn to love.

A contest entry

spelling and grammar errors?

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Comments


  • ShaShay
    November 10

    Edit | Reply
    I like this. You captured so many feelings in here. Excellent take on the prompt. A little off the middle, that's good. Best of luck in the contest.
    Sharon


  • charmander13
    October 22

    Edit | Reply
    Ohmygod, I love this!! Haha. Yeah, this is the first poem that I've read for the contest that makes me jerk out of the regular take on the prompt... but yeah, there're some spelling/ grammar errors-

    Title: "waist"- do you mean "waste"?

    "grow into a tree that's fruit will loose the bitter when bittersweet"
    =" grow into a tree where its fruit will lose its bitterness and turn into the bittersweet"
    (uh, something like that - I'm not quite sure what you're trying to bring across by saying "bitter when bittersweet" ? ...
    Please do revise these parts, thanks.


    But the overall mood and atmosphere of the poem is very nice, and I'll be placing you on the finalists list!


    Thank you so much for your entry and all the best to you!


    ♥ Char


    • HereComesTheSun
      October 24
      Edit | Reply
      i fixed up the grammar mistakes you showed me and thank you for spending the time to do that.
      as for the bitter and bittersweet part
      what i was trying to get across was she is loosig the bitter part of bittwersweet only leaving sweet.

  • Time focus on Me
    October 22

    Edit | Reply

    Amazin

    Write this is such beautiful poem. I can reali relate to this poem. u done a great job expressin your heart and soul into this poem keep up the marvelous work sis this is amazin..