She heard egg.
He meant seed.
The veins of earth
rocked with heat
magma of need.
Emotional math
sprang to root
tangled with rains
sang the heart
wracked with waves
flowers floating
spume sea.
Arms hold
knowledge
where life is decreed.
She spread out.
Faith anchors
trunk to root
heart under arbor.
Man could have his egg.
Woman would gather
family to branch
hearth to wood
babe to sprout
celebrate. Wisdom
comes as a tree.
2:04 PM
10-21-09
Alexandria, VA
Author notes
would love to post the picture but as a person unable to afford more than free, it is not to be.
Please tell me what you think, what it makes you feel, how you are moved.
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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She heard egg.
He meant seed.
The veins of earth
rocked with heat
magma of need.
Emotional math
sprang to root
tangled with rains
sang the heart
wracked with waves
flowers floating
spume sea.
- i didnt think at first this was going to flow well, but you proved me wrong with the second stanza, nicely done.
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There is magic in dem words
Peace,
Tom B.
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Interesting take yet surprisingly for the twenty first century of the common era still maintaining categories that contemporary and especially potential future existence could perhaps have left behind
Man could have his egg.
Woman would gather
As if Man could have his egg and eat it while the women gather and foregather, sired and desired ... perhaps from leafy tree back to grass roots ?
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Reflections
it is part of the assembly code to create meaning where only events existed, to sort the case for cause when it doesn't exist anymore then the effect.
I appreciate the ethnological anthropological insights on this poem. The category allows for a lot of explanation on how differences are abused more than celebrated. This thinking leads to close to the didactic and that line or reasoning is to self-righteous to lead to any good.
Enjoyed your review,
Thank you
Tom B.
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When I read the title I thought that I wasn't going to like this poem- In this case first impressions were completely wrong! I love this, especially the last lines- Wisdom comes as a tree.
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Thank you
Often when we think we know... we don't. It is the brave soul who lets go of the life raft of righteousness.
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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It was such a beautiful poem and made much sense. Thankyou for the sweet words of yor mind.
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Read my reply to Vampyre Lord Onyx. I enjoy illuminating darkness.
Thank you for finding so much in my poem worthy to defend.
Peace,
Tom B.
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the title i feel is somewhat misleading, but i may have missed the point of the poem...i really didn't have any idea what you were talking about...it just didn't make sense to me....if there is a point to it, shoot me a message and give me a clue....thanks.
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History is the mystery. Why did the chicken cross the road? Said on vaudeville comic to his partner. "I don't know. Why did the chicken cross the road?" pause "To get to the other side replies the partner." Rim shot. Audience laugh. One of the oldest gags around. After which came first the chicken or the egg comes which is more necessary the action or the reason for the action. Men and women see the same thing and because of genetic proclivities and predispositions have different versions. They both claim they are right the other is wrong. No one has a patent on telling the truth.
'nuff said,
Tom B.
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Stunning imagery and metaphorical wonder here!! Astounding vocabulary with thought provoking concepts. Very well done poet!
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Thank You Much
I wanted to take the idea to places perhaps others had not looked. Glad you enjoyed.
Peace,
Tom B.
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It makes me pause
The first two lines are especially catching. It is an interesting series of images. the tension between the "She" and "He" is nicely resolved in the last stanza and I especially enjoy the comforting "rooting" imagery. It connects big concepts to wood, a tree. I really like it. It is beautiful imagery and insistent rhythm.
I wonder, what sort of tree did you have in mind while you were writing?
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The Tree Of Life
I see nothing wrong in there being a tension between man and woman. This frisson is a constant source of creativity. Those who want to make it about a judgment of who's better, who's best miss the boat. Frankly, I don't mind leaving them behind.
Thanks for stoppng by. I am delighted that you have enjoyed my efforts.
Peace,
Tom B.
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I think we can all gather a sense of our instinctive roles as hunters and gatherers; the wolf and the dove, but also having the ability to perform the others' role is something we could all learn from.
Nobody's responsibility is more severe than the ones we're given, or so we think when we haven't seen for ourselves what needs to be done in order for all to move forward accordingly. But we see another side to it when we have to, don't we? : i.e., a wife and mother changing a tire, changing a lock, pest prevention...lol...taking out garbage, mowing the lawn. Plumbing. ugh.
then there's the mother with her nurturing/nurse/taxi/counselor/cheerleader/housecleaning/lover-bringing it home and frying it up in the pan sultriness that makes a good wife/mother/lover- hats.
nothing heartened me towards my ex more, than to see him making pancakes for the girls, or helping nurse a wound and kissing it to make it all better.
I love this write from you Tom. I dont really need to see the prompt in order to get the picture.
Love always,
jin
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Just as a woman learns that she is no less a woman when she is competent in a mechanical universe, so a man learns he is still a man and a better one at that when he learns to be caring and gentle in the human universe.
Now, I make breakfast and it is a family meal, at least once a week. Pancakes, waffles with sausage and other neat stuff. Sometimes its crepes around strawberries and whip cream on top. I am sure the girls told you about my breakfasts while they were here. One of the hardest tricks in life is to get that it is what you bring to the task that is expressed in what you do.I change diapers, do laundry and wash dishes and clean the toilet. It is all about loving the people I live with and wanting them to have a good place to live. My wife works and cooks most of the meals, she does more than her fair share and my son and I pitch in to make sure she is not alone in carrying the load. We are different. But, we are alot alike as well. So I just love her the way she is, perfect down to her last imperfection.
Love,
Tom B.
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We do see things, understand things, from such different perspectives betimes. You set us up to understand that in the first lines. Nicely done!
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Beautiful, Tom. Simply lovely stuff.
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Thank You Much
The picture Carol used for the contest is beautiful. you should go look at it. me, I had to play with it from my own perverse view point. Glad you saw the beauty in it. For most, for me, is the creation of beauty. We are not evil. Stumbling, learning, error prone, yes. But we can participate in the creation of beauty. It is a clear sign of the Light that lives within us. We must never forget.
Love,
Tom B.
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I will take this as a woman... as a high compliment!
"Wisdom comes as a tree"
Yet in praise back
the seed had to form, the tree.
Very clever write i liked it!
Made me smile
Love,
~Lisa~P
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I meant it to be
I sprang off a picture on the contest site. you should like it. I wanted to play with the man and woman not getting each other as part of the dynamic. Glad you enjoyed it.
Love,
Tom B.
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i like this. my first feeling is that it is intriguing as it takes a couple of reads to get a meaning from it. However it has a wonderful smoothness to it as it is read and beautiful phrasing. I particularly like the first verse and i love the parallells between humans and nature throughout. yet another brilliant poem of yours.
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I wanted to express woman as a tree and at the same time catch the miscommunication between the sexes and how meaning is lost when we get to convinced of our own position. The only way to truly see someone is to be able to greet them with no preconceived.
Love,
Tom B.
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This was a very well written piece of work you have here. I found this really enjoyable too read. Had a good flow too it. Keep up the awsome work.
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Thanks for this sudden interest
I started writing forty-three years ago. Have no intention at stopping. Just, trying to get better. Which can be trying on my readers. Thanks for stopping and sharing your time and joy with me.
Peace,
Tom B.
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