I once spoke to you in ham-fisted lines;
Coarse, hoarse whispers of carnal designs
Merely to satiate my base urges
With frequent heated nocturnal purges.
Over the course of time, it became more
As the two of us began to explore
Feelings intimate to each others hearts.
This my sweet princess is where true love starts.
I've expressed my feelings in simple rhyme;
Though I have become more polished with time
You remain my cherished inspiration
For odes of passionate contemplation.
The great Plato had it right, I know it:
At love's touch, each man becomes a poet.
-for Stef-
Coarse, hoarse whispers of carnal designs
Merely to satiate my base urges
With frequent heated nocturnal purges.
Over the course of time, it became more
As the two of us began to explore
Feelings intimate to each others hearts.
This my sweet princess is where true love starts.
I've expressed my feelings in simple rhyme;
Though I have become more polished with time
You remain my cherished inspiration
For odes of passionate contemplation.
The great Plato had it right, I know it:
At love's touch, each man becomes a poet.
-for Stef-
Author notes
Inspired by Stef and
Image source: http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51KlzLC-vIL._SL500_AA280_.jpg
In a list
A contest entry
- I Want to Know What Love Is (or Isn't) by Carolina Moon.
1000 points, ended October 22, 18 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
-
Thank's for your poem...I'm looking for some "Inspiration" myself.
I don't usually write in rhyme but am currently thinking of writing a sonnet.
This poem was bawdy, playful,sincere and lilting all at once-
very enjoyable to read!

-
-
Thank you for stopping by and commenting on my poem. It is much appreicated. I am glad you enjoyed the poem.
Mike
-
-
That was a bit of a shock- my touchpad is a bit sticky and I clicked the feature box in error. My name is Stef, and I was very sure you hadn't written this for me lolol
Anyway, ahem.
It is difficult to present a critique when one does not know and cannot check a person's usual style of work (can't click away from the page without wasting your points) so I have no idea of the actual tone intended. I read this as slightly bashful to your girl.
I am not a great lover of rhyming poetry, but I do appreciate it when it resonates and when I only notice the rhyme because of the music of the rhythm of the tropes as much as the actual words. Yes- it probably is love to write a classic style poem , a sonnet even to the object of your love, and this made me smile a sort of warm fuzzy smile.
The final rhyming couplet struck me from a number of angles- the cliche know it /poet rhyme combined with Plato gives the poem its wry tone to me.
-
-
Everyone should have someone who will write a poem for them... Did I really say that? Before coming to this site about 18 months ago, I rarely read poetry and was known mostly for off color limericks. I agree that well written rhyme should generally be done where the rhyme is subtle and not hitting you in the face with a hammer unless it is humerous rhyme.
I thought for a time about the cliche in the last line. It is usually a horrid choice, but I was hoping it would work with this poem.
Thank you for stopping by and reading. I am glad you enjoyed the pome.
Mike
-
-
I love this it may be simple rhyme to you but its a beautiful write to me - well done on the trophy!


-
-
Thank you very much. I am glad you enjoyed the poem. I had been negelectful about writing one for Stef. This contest afforded me the oppurtunity to do so.
Mike
-
-
This Is amazing, and I am sure it went down really well

You done a great job with your feelings on this one Mike
Kudos
Congrats on the bronze

-
-
Thank you very much. I am glad you enjoyed this one. It was very well recieved. Once in a while I can pull off something special.
Mike
-
-
What a wonderfully sweet sonnet. Love sneaks in when we least expect it I suppose. I enjoyed this as I'm sure Stef did as well. Ending lines were awesome! Thank you for a great entry!


-
-
Thank you very much or reading and commenting on my poem. I am glad you enjoyed this. The bronze cup is very much appreciated.
Mike
-
-
It's nice when things develope beautifully over time
lovely poem, great dedication. I really like the word usage, as always XD


-
-
Sometimes I am pleasent despite myself. Thank you for reading adn commenting. It is always appreciated when you stop by.
Mike
-
-
That reserve line everyone's talkin' bout sounds like it's spoken from the guy I first met... he was quite rude to me, but I set him straight
Nice word choices (you're sending me a dinosaur still, right?
)
I liked it lots! Thank You


-
-
Haha. It was done as a joke. Originally, I was going to write some horrid little drivel that mocked love, but I was inspired to write something decent. You need to put rude people in place or they do not change.
I will get you a dinosaur for Christmas. I think you will like it.
Mike
-
-
This is really sweet Mike!
I thought you would have gone a different route with this considering your reserve said "love is having someone to boink!" lmao It shows that under all that humour you are a true softy!
I loved the quote from Plato at the end it gives the poem a wonderful romantic end. Best of luck in the contest


-
-
I am glad you liked this. The boink comment was purely to mess with the judge. I am soft, most people would say soft in the head. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Mike
-
1 - 16 of 16










