I Want

I want to tell you I told you so.

I told you you didn't want me.
I told you I wanted what I couldn't have.
I told you not to give me hope if there's nothing there.
I told you so.

I want to tell you what I think.

I think you're the biggest fucking tease.
I think I'm losing you after all and it scares me.
I think that I'm figuring out what I feel.
I think about you.

I want to tell you everything I wish.

I wish I could stop trying so hard.
I wish you'd notice me.
I wish I didn't miss you so much.
I wish a lot.

I want to tell you what I want.

I want to know who I am.
I want to know just what to say.
I want to know what I'm here for.
And then I want you.

I want to have you in more ways than one.
I want to fuck you.
I want to kiss you.
I want to hug you.
I want to hold you.
I want to cuddle with you.
I want to see you more.
I want to have you around.
I want to not be referred to as your ex.
I want to be your friend.
I want to be close like before.
I want you.

I want you.
I want. I want. I want.

And the worst part about it?
I can't have it.
I can't have any of it.

But I still want.