I saw man fall
In my peripheral vision,
Yet when i turned around to face him,
there he stood- rather tall.
I turned back to face the day
and in my peripheral vision saw
man step down off his stilts
and crumble to the ground.
I stilled to watch,
out of the corner of my eyes
the spectacle unfold
as man, he called to me
to tell me of his conquests
and blundered each attempt
in his blind mortality he,
believed i could not see
then clock-wise i turned to face the night
and saw him come undone
Don't sugar coat what you don't like, let me know even if i won't agree.
Comments
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A very interesting poem. It was quiet engaging the entire way through. The only thing that sort of stopped the flow was the word ground, floor would flow much better and suit the tone of the poem. Anyway, you don't have to agree just my opinion =D
Generally I don't read poetry of this format but this was fantastic. The imagery and language you've used is awesome. I read the title and was a bit eh but I read the poem and found myself to be wrong. A magnificent poem that I really enjoyed reading.
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