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Better Think Twice About 'Dark Delights'!!!

Missing image
Rich, dark chocolate,
a smooth and creamy treasure,
guaranteed to bring this girl
the maximum of pleasure.

My eager mouth starts drooling
at the very sight...
my fingers get a licking
after each and every bite.

I love the sweet sensation
of chocolate on my tongue.
I must be addicted 'cause
I cannot stop at one.

I enjoy unwrapping
each golden chunky bar.
You'll find them in my kitchen,
on my bed and in my car.

I have gotten lotsa dough
from a tender and generous 'tooth fairy',
but I miss those 'pearly whites'
and my smile which is now one big 'carie'.

I need to find a dentist
and see him 'on the double'...
he's got to pull the 'sweet tooth'
that's caused me all this trouble!!!

Maureen E. Halasovski



A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 35 of 35
  • Lamp
    October 31
    Edit | Reply
    very cute! makes me hungry too!


  • Pattiboo silver member
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    I just love the opening stanza and the picture has me wanting to take a bite

    congratulations on the bronze pity it couldn't have been a box of luxury chocolate


  • Aesthete2000 gold member
    October 25

    Edit | Reply
    From sensual delight
    to dentistry choice--
    you covered it all
    in shiny bronze.
    Great!!!!!!!!!!

    M-C


    • Maureen silver member
      October 31

      Edit | Reply

      Thanks, M-C!

      I made a music video to the song "Dancin' in the Moonlight". I noticed a prominent sign in one of the pics' I used for the video.

      (I didn't notice the sign until after I read your prize-winning poem.)

      Here is a link to the music video: (Be on the look-out for the sign "Ghirardelli" at approx. 58 minutes into the video):

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEQnC1MTIQE


      Enjoy!

      <3 Maureen





      • Aesthete2000 gold member
        October 31
        Edit | Reply
        Great!!Loved the selections you made.

        Saw the sign---Ghirardelli is a
        San Francisco landmark--along with
        the Bay bridge!!!

        Thank you for sharing!

        M-C


  • pixiestix gold member
    October 24

    Edit | Reply
    Congratulations on the bronze Maureen.

    Mind if I sample a bit of the chocolate while I'm back in here? lol


    • Maureen silver member
      October 24
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, Pixie! You can have all you want!

      <3 Maureen


  • Yemassee gold member
    October 22

    Edit | Reply
    Here is the thing. Get them all yanked out, get some falsies and no more problems. Eat all the chocolate your tummy can handle.

    Yem's sensible solution, lol Pass me one of those candy bars please.

    • Maureen silver member
      October 23
      Edit | Reply
      That is a sensible solution, Yem. Thank you! I've talked to a Buddhist dentist and he seems to be the dentist I've been looking for all my life (one I could trust). He counts on 'word of mouth' for new customers so that makes me think he'll do a good job. I've got my fingers crossed. (looking forward to having a smile like that one again)

      Re: European candy vs American candy...I got curious and bought a small box of candy from Germany. It was delicious! Come to my house trick or treat night and I will treat you right!

      <3 Maureen

  • Purrsanthema
    October 22

    Edit | Reply
    YUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


  • angelica silver member
    October 22

    Edit | Reply
    Dear Maureen, a wonderful poem about chocolates but ohhh, the damage they do to the teeth. But very yummy to eat, especially to lick off the finger. Good luck in the voting.
    Love Joan

    • Maureen silver member
      October 22
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you, Joan! A few years ago, I bit into a pc. of Russell Stover's chocolate and one of my front teeth broke off. I wrote to Russell Stover and sent them my tooth and the pc. of chocolate that caused the problem. They examined the candy and told me the sugar in the chocolate had hardened. They told me to go to a dentist and send them the bill. I made the mistake of seeing a Mexican dentist recommended to me when I was at a Mexican clinic. His repair was cheap but, as they say, you get what you pay for. The repair lasted for about six months and then the replacement tooth fell out. I ended up paying a lot of out of pocket money to 'fix' the damage the incompetent Mexican dentist caused. I didn't eat Russell Stover chocolate (or any other kind) for several years after my traumatic experience. It was only recently that I decided to 'risk' eating chocolate again. When I find a dentist I can 'trust', my remaining teeth will have to be pulled. They're beyond 'saving'. Sad story but true (but I still love chocolate).

      Love, Maureen ♥


  • Blushfulmoon silver member
    October 22

    Edit | Reply

    excellent

    Enjoyed the read sis
    Like you I ate too many chocolates and finally had to get those teeth culprits extracted.........no fun..............but eating the chocolate sure was
    Love the rhyme and flow and your descriptions for the chocolate..........finger licking good...........sounds like a Ky Fried Chicken mantra LOL only this one was for chocolate.
    Best of luck in the contest and ty for reading my short haiku
    I just couldn't think of anything long to rhyme with chocolate
    I sent you an e mail yesterday about Patrick Swayze...did you get it and the note included????
    Let me know
    Hope all is well with you I had to go to ER tonight in severe pain after I had chemo today
    Telll Mike hi and best of luck in the contest
    Love you
    Your sis
    Susan~~~~

    • Maureen silver member
      October 22
      Edit | Reply
      Hey Sis! Thanks for commenting. Sorry to hear you are still suffering because of chemo. I think sometime in the future, people will look back on the way cancer is being treated today as 'barbaric'. Heck, I look at it that way now!

      I'm as good as could be expected under the circumstances (not very). <--- (that's a wilted rose) I'm making the best of a bad situation (what else can I do?)

      Tell Danny and Bruce hi. I wish you good luck, too!

      Love you, Sis

      ♥ Maureen


  • Concrete Angel silver member
    October 21

    Edit | Reply
    MMMMMMM!!! I want chocolate now! LOL. This was light and fun and witty and I loved your conclusion as well lol. My sweet tooth has me in trouble all the time. And you know I was watching something the other day where this lady said if you're craving chocolate just eat a piece of fruit and you won't crave it anymore. I thought HA! That won't work for me! When I want chocolate I want CHOCOLATE!!! LOL. Anyway, now that I've ranted well there's not much else to say other than I absolutely loved every perfect bit of this

    • Maureen silver member
      October 22
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, Concrete Angel! I loved your poem, too! Best of Luck getting your work published one day.

      ♥ Maureen


  • hugh wyles silver member
    October 21

    Edit | Reply

    Dear Maureen,

    I commented on this superb entry half an hour ago but my comment and applause has disappeared!!
    What I said was that, like you, "I must be addicted 'cause I cannot stop at one."
    I'm always amazed and sad to find how quickly I've got to the last bite of the bar or the last choc-in-the-box.
    I also said that it takes a brave sense of humour to write a fun poem about toothache. I remember when I was inflicted with it and I think there are few worse forms of agony.
    As I've told you, I had all my teeth extracted years ago and can eat nuts, hard chocolate, anything - no more dentists' drills or bills for me!! And it's easy to clean chocolate off my dentures - I just take them out and brush them under a running tap! LOL.
    I hope the system will let me applaud your poem again (it said I got 6 points for my earlier comment.
    Anyway, best of luck in the voting and thanks for a splendid entry. I hope your toothache is either better or removed.)
    Applause, love and hugs, again, XXX Hugh (R.)

    NOOO! It says I already rated it.

  • hugh wyles silver member
    October 21
    Edit | Reply

    Dear Maureen,

    I hope your toothache has stopped (or been removed?) There are few pains worse than toothache. As I've told you I had all mine removed years ago. No more dentists' drills or bills for me! And it's easy to clean chocolate off my dentures - I just take them out to brush them!!
    If anyone could write a humorous poem about toothache, it would be you! What a brave sense of fun you are blessed with.
    Like you "I must be addicted 'cause I cannot stop at one." I'm always amazed to find how quickly I got to the last bit of the bar or the last choc-in-the-box!
    Good luck in the voting for a superb entry.
    Applause, love and hugs, XXX Hugh (R.)


  • Pattiboo silver member
    October 21
    Edit | Reply
    Almost orgasmic lol and here I am with not a square of it in the house .

    best of luck in the contest


  • MargaretG
    October 21

    Edit | Reply

    Love it!

    This rhyming is a delight to read, and the description of sweets and consequences is priceless. I like puns, I'm silly that way. Cheers and hugs, best of luck!

  • pixiestix gold member
    October 20
    Edit | Reply
    So very clever and funny Maureen!

    I really enjoyed the twist, so unexpected from the opening verses and the picture.

    Best to you in the contest.


    • Maureen silver member
      October 20
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks a lot, Pix! Glad you enjoyed it!

      ♥ Maureen


  • Sai Babas Lotus
    October 20

    Edit | Reply
    A very humorous and well penned piece of work. I enjoyed the way it flowed and the rhyme except for some parts where it got broken off. Good imagery throughout. I love chocolates, but trying to get a hold on them So, I enjoyed this even better. Goodluck in the contest.

    Charishma

    • Maureen silver member
      October 20
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, Charishma!

      I've made some changes that repaired the broken parts (I hope).

      Keep smilin'!

      <3 Maureen


  • Misskaoz
    October 20

    Edit | Reply
    Great poem. This poem has to win gold in my opinion. It's written beautifully with a little humor.


  • Pisces rainbow gold member
    October 20

    Edit | Reply

    oh yeah!

    I so love this

     

    have your sweet tooth removed 

     

    WHERE did you say your stash was?

     

    just curious 

     

     

    very cute and clever 

     

    God bless you my friend...

     

    • Maureen silver member
      October 20
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks a lot, Kathleen! I always enjoy your comments (but I'd rather give you cash than to show you my stash).

      GOD BLESS YOU, MY FRIEND!

      ♥ Maureen


  • fallendust
    October 20

    Edit | Reply
    lol! Wow this poem is great! I loved it! It made me chuckle and smile from ear to ear! Great ending! Have a wonderful day!
    Sincerely,
    Sarah


    • Maureen silver member
      October 20
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, Sarah! I appreciate your comment!

      Sincerely,
      Maureen

  • Aesthete2000 gold member
    October 20
    Edit | Reply
    "You'll find them in my kitchen,
    on my bed and in my car."

    Ah, wise girl, indeed--
    a stash everywhere
    of her passion!!

    Clever indulgence, Maureen!

    M-C

    • Maureen silver member
      October 20
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, M-C! I always appreciate your comments! I've got a lot of reading to do before the contest is over. I was 'under the weather'...that's why I didn't submit something sooner.

      ♥ Maureen

      • Aesthete2000 gold member
        October 21
        Edit | Reply
        Oh, Maureen, I hope all the chocolate
        gives you a lift so high that it will
        keep you from being "under the weather"
        for a long while!!!

        Sending love and hugs,

        M-C


  • catz Moderators member
    October 20

    Edit | Reply
    Funny, Maureen... but I still have no desire to change Sorry about your poor tooth fairy experiences, though... except for the money part of course

    An amusing poem, and I wish you best in the contest

    Dee


    • Maureen silver member
      October 20
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, Dee! I was 'under the weather'...that's why I didn't submit something sooner.

      ♥ Maureen

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