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Confessions

This pain you've inflicted,
it has no end.
You were my love,
now no longer my friend.
Tears keep on falling,
though I wish they would stop.
I thought I had taken charge,
but you were always on top.
Pulling my strings
like the puppet I am.
Shepherding me along
like a little lamb.
Now how I wish
I could just disappear.
Your thoughts and emotions
were never so unclear.
I desperately wish
you'd let me understand,
but you push me away
with a single command.
Just tell the truth. Just say it.
I'm sick of you pretending.
You act as if I've vanished from existence.
You know what? Screw you.
Why can't I break free?
You've made it clear you don't want me.
Confessions:
I still sneak looks whenever I can
I still look for you in the crowd
I wonder what you're doing
I wonder what you're thinking
I cry when I see you with her
I still dream about you
And, my biggest confession:
I Still Love You.
Father, please forgive this sin
I'd let you break my heart again.
Over
and
over.
I just don't learn.
And you won't show me
a touch of concern.

Well fuck you then.

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Comments


  • TheGlassHathCometh
    November 14
    Edit | Reply
    Another good one


  • Chanes Forever
    October 22

    Edit | Reply

    Awwww...*hugs Ellen*

    It's not that I'm all sunshine or anything, but I do hate seeing people in moods like this. I hope you're feeling better already...
    Now, about the poem itself...You know, I'm kinda jealous of you sometimes, because I've always thought that you write REALLY good poetry. Seriously. Such as this!
    Parts I am especially fond of:the uneven lengths of the lines (flaws are everywhere-in relationships AND poems, so it just makes it natural), the "confessions" list and the biggest confession line (loved it, affected the poem in a very good way), the "Father, please forgive this sin" line (because in my poetic opinion I like how you wrote it as if it were a sin to still care so much...in my realisitc opinion-it's not a sin. People are people BECAUSE sometimes they care too much. Even though it sucks.)....and the final line. I always appreciate it when poems end in such a way as that. Very blunt. Very emotive. Very good.
    That is my rant of the day, I hope you have enjoyed it. And I hope you are happier than you were when you wrote this.