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This Needs Something

    Is this a pain I cannot feel, to come up short for something real?
Must torments crown my dizzy head, from us too close the road ahead,
it pains my self, the heart of stone, from which the rose of thorns does grow.

If it is broken, what is the cure,
for loving something real and pure?
A longer path, a price of pain,
to forget the day that heart-strings played.

I suppose.

You have an opinion, speak it.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • AngelicDreams
    October 19

    Edit | Reply
    I like it. It made me think about stuff in general and there's something going on in my head the last few days and this struk a cord...

    Great job, Jeremy