the battle on the skyline
began with the destitute sirens
underground
hysterical voices that go unheard -
hands that only grope
for the things, the good, shining overhead.
and he ascended, a natural victory
throttled by the crowds but spurred on
by the vision of star-bright success -
by the desire for something beyond dark peasantry.
crawling through the crowds of wall street -
some crown, this immobile freedom
to live by the lines
of supply and demand,
the rise and fall with the stock flux
and once he reached that golden egg,
perched amongst the skyscraper powers
nothing got brighter
he felt it hollow, the sucking core -
his grip, his hard handshake
could only loosen in the knowing -
and his fall, so many stories
to lay prostrate on this dead concrete
- of commerce, of endless desire
unwanting.
A contest entry
- Characterization I by Ryno.
1000 points, ended October 24, 5 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
A great piece you've written here. I loved the images, the character, the theme, emotion and the title. All done very well.
You really made the characterization strong, as powerful as I had imagined one could by using this interesting picture. You used refreshing, and well-used vocabulary and creative concepts to give a new voice to this topic.
I loved how you were able to add important events and changes in the character's "life" by only using a few words. You used quality to portray, not quantity.
Wonderfully done.
Thanks for the entry,
Ryan
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