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a hive in my heart

circulation is an ant farm
each blood vessel something's burden
i am not i,
what is a puzzle without pieces?

the world melts
into one puddle,
the periodic table disarrays
and dances to the ground,
everything drowns,
everything breathes in unison






Author notes

hello again everyone. i hope to be creating more soon.

p.s. everything seems far more beautiful than any of us realize

reality tunnel?

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Lj-
    November 11
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    I also hope you shall be creating more soon.

  • likeforeignpost
    October 22

    Edit | Reply
    not sure. the most distinct quality i get from this is something anti-reductionist but i can't make much more of it than that. are you going to tell me to read more RAW? as far as i can tell, the Oneness you're describing is in awe or appreciation of something that's emergent and not recognizeable upon it's deconstruction (the periodic table disarrays), or a yearning for some base reverence. i associate the blood vessels as part of your idea of separating things into constituents though i'm not sure where it leads other than some general conclusion revealing that things are more than the sum of their parts (in reference to the puzzle metaphor)? actually i might be (and i get the feeling that there's a good chance i am) on the wrong track altogether. but this is the best i can do at 3:00 a.m. if there's any specific RAW stuff i should read then send me it via here, or if not i'll try to get prometheus rising from you sometime, i'm sure that will reveal some things as well. i do like this though, i just don't think i'm getting out of it all you meant to put in.

    i'll put up some stuff of mine soon if not tonight


    • formless
      October 24
      Edit | Reply
      p.s. prometheus rising is a more-than-adequate intro to raw, ill just loan you that, after katie finishes it.

      p.p.s. whatever the thinker thinks, the prover proves. think about it. prove it.


    • formless
      October 23
      Edit | Reply
      i am not i. the being that is known as me is not me, nor is it a single being, i am a collection of living and nonliving matter, an abstract construct. the particles of me have toiled day in and day out for no reward outside of their own sustenance, why should "i" be any different? how is it even possible to live a life not in servitude, what is a puzzle without pieces?

      if we are all dependent upon submicroscopic matter, what separates us at all? if my left hand and my right hand are the same, are they not the same hand? where do "i" end and where do "you" begin? what is death? if i am not i, how is death even possible? or have i already died and resurrected? or am i still just dead?

      everything drowns,
      everything breathes in unison

      food for thought


      • hilly
        October 23
        Edit | Reply
        the second part of what you said there reminds me of a poem i'm writing. don't be surprised if the next thing i post seems similarly directed.


  • Sheilasbabygal4life gold member
    October 21

    Edit | Reply
    This was a very well written piece of work you have here. Was nicely done. I found this really enjoyable too read. Keep up the awsome work.


  • The Fox.
    October 18

    Edit | Reply
    This this really, really intriguing. I guess this is a very good poem about everything kind of falling apart at the seams. Something I can relate to very easily lately. I love this write. Good job. &hearts

1 - 9 of 9