Neverland

punch the marrow and suck out the bones, run through the mud and kick up the rain and scream through the hallways so no one can hear you and love the echoes bouncing along hospital tile and high school water fountains and hate the chalk on the playground and on the blackboard. saturate the sky with ink fight through the fire and touch the supernovas, ride the horsehead nebula so you can sink into the devil's understanding waters and lose yourself in the legends about past-46-years You and compare yourself to him and her and them.

watch through dull transparent eyelids and read the yellowing pages of afterlife and keep the frustration bottled up bottled up bottled up so you can one day explode in a million tiny shards of imperfection, lovely.

hug your teddy bear against your chest and cry until your eyes are crystal clear and they've grown swollen and sickly and you can see through them to the back of your mind forever.

talk to the plastic buttons and dial the voice on the other side, read the leaves and flip through the words and never let them tell you what to forget. crack the penny and shatter the dollar coins when you take the piggy bank to Neverland's funeral





you have to watch them slaughter the little imaginations of him and her and them. but when they try to kiss you back to them, hate into their eyes and gaze at their clammy fingers through your too-stiff lashes because you couldn't save him and her and them and You.

it's okay because i'll tell you so and you can forget we ever existed