She delights in the sparrow that I gave her.
In her lap she may tease it with her finger.
Sharp, hard pecking just thrills and makes her braver.
After passions abate her pleasure lingers.
She finds solace in playing with the singer.
I am glad to behold her touching pleasure,
and I’m pleased to have been the one behind it.
She’s discovered contentment in some measure;
would that I too could from the sparrow find it.
Should it lighten my heart, I wouldn’t mind it.
Author notes
Catullus, a Roman poet of the 1st Century BCE, often wrote of a woman named Claudia whom he referred to as Lesbia in honor of Sappho of Lesbos, the great 7th Century BCE Greek poet.
His poem, nowadays known simply as Catullus 2, considers his girl’s fondness for a pet sparrow – with obvious double entendre. The foregoing English Quintain verses are developed on my impressions of it. Following is a well-accepted version of the Latin original with a rough English translation/paraphrase. The meter of my English versions is an equally rough approximation of the Latin hendecasyllabic.
His poem, nowadays known simply as Catullus 2, considers his girl’s fondness for a pet sparrow – with obvious double entendre. The foregoing English Quintain verses are developed on my impressions of it. Following is a well-accepted version of the Latin original with a rough English translation/paraphrase. The meter of my English versions is an equally rough approximation of the Latin hendecasyllabic.
Passer, deliciae meae puellae,
Quicum ludere, quem in sinu tenere,
Cui primum digitum dare appetenti
Et acris solet incitare morsus,
Cum desiderio meo nitenti
Carum nescio quid lubet iocari
Et solaciolum sui doloris,
Credo ut tum gravis acquiescat ardor:
Tecum ludere sicut ipsa possem
Et tristis animi levare curas!
Sparrow, you are my girl’s delight and pleasure.
You are held in her lap where she enfolds you,
teasing you with her fingertip for pecking
so that you’ll be aroused to sharply bite her.
When for me she is glowing with her longing,
when she wants pleasure from some dear diversion,
you provide solace for her tender aching.
Ardor then, I believe, is somewhat sated.
If only I could play with you as she does
and so ease my own heart’s impassioned yearning!
In a list
A contest entry
- Translation! Translation! Translation! by Mairi bheag.
1800 points, ends December 12, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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The second appearance of Catullus in this contest (so far). This is a lovely piece, but I reckon it's more of a fantasia on a theme, rather than a translation. I'll look at it in its own right. Thanks for showing us this side of Catullus.
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Wow! I love what you have done with this- the cadence and rhyme add much to an already sensual read. Thank you for the author notes, very interesting.
Best wishes in the contest,
K
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This leaves me a bit flustered...for a poem about a sparrow!
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I also enjoyed your poem with the flow, rhyme, and language structure. It seems perfect!
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Love the picture... your words are a perfect complement.
Wow... so many other connotations could be used for this write.
I found it pleasurable toi read, the rhyme and rhythm being flawless...
And the vocabulary being elegant, yet simple.
Excellent write. -
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I like the picture, too. It was posted for a contest here on All Poetry, and I thought it was perfect for this poem.
The poem is a couple of years old. I do not know what inspired me to try writing a poem based on a poem from another language, especially one from the Latin. It must have been a daunting experience, because I haven't tried it more than this one time!
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so very sweet and well penned! I like!
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An excellent write.
Apart from being very informative ( thanks for sharing this ), the poem stands out with its subtle sensuality and flow. I am yet to come out of the trance with the line -'After passions abate her pleasure lingers'.
Keep inspiring.
Chinmay
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My Latin isn't as good as it once was, but I think your poem comes closer to what I think the original poem meant. And it has a finer rhythm! I like the undertones, too. Beautifully done. Many years ago, when the hospital I was working in was building new rehabilitation unit, I went up to look at it with another therapist, and we found a sparrow that had been trapped inside; it had flown under the upper level barriers but couldn't fly low again to get out. It was so tired that I was able to catch it in my hands, and then release it outside. I can not tell you what an amazing feeling the beating of that little heart gave me! This was no tame bird, of course, so I'm sure it was fatigue and fear, whereas Claudia perhaps felt only a contented little thrill... Thanks for bringing back this memory.
Lita
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