it pains me to admit
my misgivings --
for once, I would have said
that the
dust on your lips
smells of
cigarettes unburned and acrid
cottonleaves
;
but
chalk it up to the remaining
few of us who deal
in aesthetics;
because some time ago, shatters
would have claimed you broken
chinawear.
Author notes
prompt: http://ineedchemicalx.deviantart.com/art/Forever-young-140475649
A contest entry
- p.i.f. quickie! C= by Kathraina.
625 points, ended October 20, 5 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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I love the format of all your poems. it never works out when I try to do that.
"but
chalk it up to the remaining
few of us who deal
in aesthetics; "
-- great lines.
congratulations on the silver.
-
Wow! Stunning take on the prompt. I found myself wrapped the tale you've woven here! Brilliant job
bravo and thank you for entering
♥ kate -
I noticed you'd been reading a lot of me and I am so slack at returning things but I wanted to come read some, I am glad I did because you have that raw and pure emotion in your work that I admire. This is a wonderful example of that, the last line in this just kicks the sand in your face and makes you hold your breath. I will be reading some more and thank you for all the reads on mine. C
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thank you.
and yes, I have you on my favorites list. -
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and I need to rectify mine with you
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This is an interesting poem;
interesting form, wording.
A very unique style is portrayed here.
Best of luck in the contest you've entered this in; pen on--
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