Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

I Remember When

I remember when...
I was the only care in your world,
the glue holding us together
for a lifetime.

I remember when...
you became my sight,
allowing me to see
only you.

I remember when...
you asked me for my life
to replace your own,
to become us.

I remember when...
you would blend my tears
with your very own,
to ease the pain within me.

I remember when...
you were always there for me
in moments of darkness,
giving light to my  blemished soul.

I forget when...
you loved me as I love you now,
I forget when I used to believe
in myself

or anything else...
















A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 54 of 54

  • red rose
    November 21
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    really great poetry and great meaning
    Keep going ^^


  • im just human
    November 17
    Edit | Reply
    wonderful words
    Keep going


  • Nature Song silver member
    November 8

    Edit | Reply
    Searching for love...as time grows older so familiar it becomes when things are going well. Then it becomes like pssing in the night, a hallway, things are still familiar, yet different, Both forget, at times what it used to be. Remiders left in photo's hanging on a wall, certain phrases that were once spoken. A glance at what used to be, and still could be! Wonderfully crafted wording for such a great poem!

    ~Sie


  • Ani Grace
    November 8
    Edit | Reply
    ...Einstein said it all...Gravity does not apply when you're falling in love...


  • Dajuan
    October 29

    Edit | Reply
    passion that is portrayed in this writing is timless.When lovers beloved the other.then it far more than physical, it spiritual.


  • poetryality silver member
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    Yes! I too remember and find it hard to ever forget. Life has a simple way of reminding us sometimes. You are and always will always be the best that you can fathom my dear brother friend. I am sure that all those who know and love YOU, know that for sure!


    Always ♥

    Renee


  • AngelBellerose gold member
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    I remember when you left me alone and the world went blue.. for the color now is just a faded memory of you.. John this is painful hun .. so deep in thought you have penned your heart and the eyes like the soul teared for you.. Hugs always Angel♥♥


  • smitaanand
    October 27

    Edit | Reply
    This is so absolutely amazingly exquisite and beautiful that it takes my breath away.The words portray a novel array of earnst and deeply intense emotions of true love and affection.The pain of losing the love that once was his is depicted within the onfines of the write.It is honestly very painful when one loves the one who loves no more ,the unrequited love gives undeniable torturos pain and this poignance is braided into the lines of this verse.Thanks for sharing ,take cre and keep sharing...


  • amnouup
    October 27
    Edit | Reply

    Soothing sad

    This poem is sad yet soothing, it has a very calm and serene feeling, felt lost in it, well done :-)


  • sinfull
    October 26
    Edit | Reply
    sorrowfull ink . Eloquent and honest..The soft mellow tone that is your style. nice


  • Poetic-Theorem gold member
    October 24

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautifully poignant
    Your words really hits home to me
    because I can relate to this poem very well.
    Paradise found; paradise lost
    a senerio that is one stable constant in my life
    Well done!
    Keep on writing
    David

  • jen123456
    October 21
    Edit | Reply
    this is wonderful nice words wtg nice one jennifer

  • Synchronicity gold member
    October 17

    Edit | Reply

    Lost in time

    This piece feels quite "lost in time". It captures deep feeling almost as if hanging in the air, then it seems even more suspended when it comes to the "I forget" verses. I was most mystified as to why you would want to forget the last two items. Many people wait their whole lives for those things, yet you had them, and forgot. Then I read the poem again, and I think, possibly, you never had those last two. An unusual technique---to use "forgot" for something you never had. It's either that or I'm the one suspended in mid air (and upside-down at that), and I have absolutely no idea what those last two lines mean. Yes, let's go with that last image. I think I look funny hanging upside down---and wondering about the true meaning of this poem. Somehow I don't think this is what you expected when you asked me to read, my apologies, I simply feel a little "lost".

    • John Faulkner
      October 18
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your specific words in regard to my poem..I appreciate your depth in doing so.This helps me as a writer..Thank you

  • Haret5
    October 17

    Edit | Reply

    Good Poem

    Obiviously the girl (I am assuming it is a girl) has lost her loved one on he does not care for her anymore. This poem makes me feel a bit sad.


  • justgot2loveme
    October 17

    Edit | Reply
    awww this is beautiful and yet so sad,
    to remember when...
    i bet some can relate to those words.
    the ending is so touching to the heart,
    makes me want to cry.
    i enjoyed your poem, it has a nice flow to it.

    justgot2loveme


  • whitecoffee
    October 17

    Edit | Reply
    yes, this is very sad. The way it's written is hypnoitizing almost. I really liked it....totally delves deep into what happens all too often in relationships, and expresses it so clearly....very nice work.


  • ravikochar
    October 17
    Edit | Reply
    And i dont remember a thing.....................apart from ..I remember....wonderful.

  • refinnej
    October 16

    Edit | Reply
    i love the repeated phrase "i remember when..." kept my attention waiting on the new memory to unfold. the last part so sad but beautiful.


    • John Faulkner
      October 16
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you sweetheart.. you are so kind..I always appreciate your comments


      John


  • Pamela A Lamppa silver member
    October 16

    Edit | Reply
    Such sadness in this tender piece of love that has waned - gone amiss. Love is really something, we are completely wrapped up in it - over the moon elated and then crash - devastated by it in a single swoop.
    Quite passionate. ~Pamela


  • MoonLovedRose
    October 16

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful. It rememinds me of a painting I once saw. A man stood in front of a partially frosted window gazing at the night sky, his face hidden from view. Beyond the window were stars and comets and the moon. A female silloutte on the moon was obscured by clouds, but still visible. It was as though his memories were taking form in nature---as though he were saying good-bye, but refusing to let go.

    This poem hints at loss, but uses bright and loving phrasing. It was very...it was...beautiful. Ha ha ha! I can't describe it any other way.


  • Rend the Veil gold member
    October 16
    Edit | Reply
    you are an awesome poet,
    and yes you could be King

    with love and blessings

    Rend

  • Wow. This reads pretty deep. Very nice.


  • Tqop
    October 16
    Edit | Reply
    Lovely job Lass. This is great.


  • Kendal Palmer gold member
    October 16

    Edit | Reply
    I believe that this write is going to resonate with many...you have written of something that happens to many as they move from the beginnings of a relationship, into that unfamiliar territory that can become so isolating...thank you for sharing...
    -Kendal

  • Well this sure sounds like a lonely place to be. It's sweet for sure, but all seems to be leaning toward something you feel is lost to you. A time, a woman or a girl, a place.....

    When all has been stripped away, and all that your left with is your Faith in love, well, that's a really good place to Begin

1 - 54 of 54