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Astigmatic

    

 

   Rolled in her skin, she lays surrounded
      by the cloud of her smoked emotions,
      ashes raining on the mattress,
                                           fly away by a sigh...

      There's a taste in the cigar filter,
      tastes like a bitter pack of memories,
      ones that refuse
      to kiss the doormat and depart her soul.

      She let loss her blinks, they run down
      the mascara lines to embrace
      the flickering lights coming from
      her closed window.

      But before the dawn hit the horizon,
      her thoughts melted and got smoked
      just before everything 
                                     fell asleep.

                                     Pinned in a frame ...
                                     I see her in me...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(C)Noor 10/12/2009 

Author notes

Contest prompt:

Picture above, credit:  "Alive Out of Habit" by lorelix04

 

Thanks for reading! 

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • perfectsunset gold member
    October 24

    Edit | Reply
    Very beautifull constructed piece.
    You've provided everything a
    reader wants and needs-

    emotion, atmosphere, depth,
    originality, metaphor, & beauty.

    This was a fantastic piece!

    Best of luck & thanks for entering

  • this is beautiful and deep. i am enchanted by your style.


  • AngelBellerose gold member
    October 13

    Edit | Reply
    this one is deep in thought for the imagery penned brought life upon the page drifted in after thoughts of this amazing message told .. well done my sweet Sis for you have rocked the pages hugs love always Angel♥


  • Ken-Maverick
    October 13
    Edit | Reply
    Bitter shaweet


  • Amera gold member
    October 13

    Edit | Reply
    This is truly a beautiful poem to read although I do find it sad especially as it concludes with the introspective statement from the author. The poem is captivating as it blends from one original image to the next leaving the reader wanting more. Well done!

    Love,
    Amera

1 - 5 of 5