For the Master of Whimsical Music
in the Tune of 'Lilies' of David.
1 "Oo God, Save Me...
These Waters I Tread Break Waves at My
Neck.
2 I am Sinking, Slightly Submerging into
The Worst of Murky Depths.
There are No Footholds,
No Safe Breathes to Breathe.
3 I am Parched.
My Voice Worn Out from
Screaming Back at You,
Help Me?! (really..)
Still My eyes Fail to See
As I Search for, ... My God!!!
4 There are Those who Seem to
Pass Too Much Judgment
Without Even a Cause.
And Those Who See it out to
Demolish All of Me.
Never Quite Forced
to be Restored
by What I Did Not Steal.
5 And You, My God ... You Know My Obliquity:
My Guilt is Not Hidden From You."
Author notes
If My God Can Not Comprehend or
Understand My Longing Sobs,
Then I Have No Faith At All..
If My Lord Can Not Love Me Trough
This Torment That He So Divinely Put Meh Into,
Then Maybe I am Truly Lost..
What Do You Get From This??
Comments
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Interesting Rendition
I can feel the emotion emitting from this piece like waves of heat upon mine soul. This is made a stronger piece by the 'work' you draw from and rephrase in thy own words. I can see the cry for help, the need for truth and for comfort and security. The frustration fills every word of every line. But do not forget that God does not do your work for you. The Lord provides the food for the animals of the wild but they still must earn/get that food by their own choice and effort. Those who speak against you, or would break you down, can never truly break you lest you let them. You have to go out into the world, figurtively and literally, and find answers, you must connect with trustworthy minds and grow while making an effort to find a calm center to your world to help you rise above the tides that threaten to consume you.
As a work, it is inspiring though the flow is a bit off and I'd change some of the wording but yo can only do so much when recreating from something else. I truly appreciate the way you penned this, full of emotion and putting your own soul and personality into it, making it all your own yet at the same time many others can relate.
As for your author note, it is not that Your God cannot comprehend, it is that you do not comprehend certain elements of your situation, of your life. The cruelty you experience is drawn from the Free Will He granted, be it directly from your poor choices or from the poor choices of others and the results of those choices. He didn't put you into torment, he put you into life upon Earth-the torment is brought on by that world and those creatures that inhabit as much as it is brought on by bad luck and lack of foresight. We all have these moments where we despair, we all make poor choices, and we are all affected by those around us be it just or otherwise-but all the same, we have it in ourselves to rise up, shrug off the cruelties and pains of the world, and shove on, even better ourselves. You must seek the Truth and Balance of yourself and of Life and the World you live in.
In you is dual strength, the strength granted by your own will and belief, your faith in whatever you choose to put faith in, god or no god, and only you can decided how powerful that inner will, that inner flame of mind and spirit is. The second strength, may you call it genetic or the Holy Spirit, is in everyone but not embraced by all. This is the strength that can make you achieve the impossible and get through the worse of things. But only confidence, only trust in self and choices made, can open this strength to full bloom. In the end, you can only count on what is true, yourself, and that which is inside of you physically, mentally, and spiritually. After you have achieved this, likely and hopefully with friends, you must then discover what it is that can connect you with the rest of the world so that you may grasp that world, tell it just who you are, and pull yourself from the dark waters and into that world, making it accept your truest and greatest self.
I hope my words, my ranting, helps in some way, I admit I got a bit carried away.
Truly and Darkly,
Dirk
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