Dear Pisces, (not a poem)

Dear Nikki,

I've been writing you letters a lot lately, but since prewrites aren't allowed (heh), I'm going to write you a new one from scratch.

I'm not really sure how personal I should make this since it's going on the internet and everything, but I think I'm just going to put myself out there and make it pretty damn personal.  I'm also not sure how poetic this will end up, but I'll try my best.  Oh no!  I am feeling the pressure already!  It's hard to write letters with the intent of actually showing it to the one you're writing it for.  Oh well.  Here goes nothing!

Nikki, I love you.  My friends and family often ask me why, and I'm usually too embarrassed to explain correctly because they might think I'm sappy.  Well secretly, you make me a little sappy, and I kind of like it.  In case you were curious about a few of the things I would have LIKED to tell them:

I love you because you're fascinating and brilliant and beautiful. 

I love you because your entire hand practically fits inside of mine. 

I love you because you never capitalize anything. 

I love you because you are the quintessential Pisces.

And most of all, I love you because I've never met anyone like you, and I probably never will.

Any flaws you have that I could think of could also be considered reasons why I love you.  In every way, you are capable of drawing more emotions from me than anyone else.  You frustrate and confuse me more than anyone else, but you also inspire me, motivate me, and make me much happier. 

If you ever thought I didn’t need you, you were sorely mistaken!  Ever since I really got to know you, I’ve become ridiculously dependant on you (surprised?).  For a while there, I actually decided to give up on you, and my life quickly became dull and meaningless. 

I’ve never felt more at peace than when we planned our future together, and I don’t know what I’d do if I knew we’d never have that future.  I want to get married in a cave and ride a train for our honeymoon.  I want to shop for towels together, and you can explain the uses for each one and I’ll try and get orange and you’ll overrule and pick something tasteful.  I want to go house hunting and grocery shopping and eat breakfast together and do taxes and wash dishes by hand and….I would be so lost without you.  I don’t ever want to do any of those things if I can’t be with you.  I truly believe you are worth waiting for, however long you want me to wait. 

I know I’m a little cocky and you’re a little neurotic, but I think we complement each other quite nicely….If you give me another chance, I swear to god I will never take you for granted again.  I will treasure each and every one of your neuroses!

If and when we get back together, I think we will be better off for what we’ve gone through.  Rather than casting a dark shadow upon our relationship, I believe we will be strengthened because all of our problems are out in the open now, so we can go about solving them.  Quite a few people have told me that if you really loved me at all you would want me the way I am now, but I say if you really care about someone you should want to help them improve themselves.  Anyone who would just put up with me the way I am (was?) and cater to my every whim is not doing me any favors.  I’ve been trying very hard to improve myself over the past several months, and I have you to thank for it.  I’ve been wearing the ring I gave you as a reminder, and it’s really been helping me when things get difficult.

In closing, I hope you give us some serious thought.  I’ve never known anyone capable of having such a stimulating conversation with me.  I actually tend to get headaches after we talk for a long time.  But it’s a satisfying kind of headache, like feeling sore after a good workout.  I’m sorry I didn’t make this longer; I didn’t want to keep you up and I did promise I would have it written by tonight.  I’m also sorry that I didn’t do anything particularly creative with it, but I just figured it was a good opportunity to tell you how I actually feel without form or rhythm.  Lastly, I’m sorry about anything I’ve ever done to make you wish bad things would happen to me.  You deserve better.

Super Sincerely,

Kate